South Park (TV Series)

Summer Sucks (1998)

Jonathan Katz: Dr. Katz

Quotes 

• [At a psychiatrist's office. Mr. Garrison's hand puppet, Mr. Hat, is missing] 

  Mr.Garrison : At first I was sure one of the children took him. But then I remembered Mr. Hat and I actually had a fight that morning.

  Dr. Katz : Um... are you gay?

  Mr.Garrison : WHAT?

  Dr. Katz : It's just a question.

  Mr.Garrison : ARE YOU PROPOSITIONING ME?

  Dr. Katz : No.

  Mr.Garrison : WELL, I CAN TELL YOU THAT I AM ONE-HUNDRED PERCENT NOT GAY.

  Dr. Katz : Well, I believe you. I absolutely believe you.

  Mr.Garrison : Mr. Hat, on the other hand...

  Dr. Katz : Mr. Hat was gay?

  Mr.Garrison : Sometimes he fantasizes about things of sexual natures.

  Dr. Katz : I see.

  Mr.Garrison : Sometimes Mr. Hat liked to pretend he was in a sauna with Brett Favre and a bottle of Thousand Island Dressing.

  Dr. Katz : That I did not need to know.

  Mr.Garrison : Well, I'm just saying.

  Dr. Katz : Mr. Garrison, I think Mr. Hat was actually your gay side trying to come out. You see, it is YOU who is gay. But, you're in denial, so you act out your gay persona with a homosexual puppet.

  [long pause] 

  Dr. Katz : What do you think about that?

  Mr.Garrison : I THINK YOU'RE THE LOONY ONE IN THIS ROOM.