SpongeBob SquarePants (TV Series)

Big Pink Loser/Bubble Buddy (2000)

Rodger Bumpass: Squidward Tentacles, Crowd Member #3

Quotes 

• Francis : He kept us waiting for a bubble?

  Larry the Lobster : That's nothing! He called us fat!

  Pearl Krabs : [crying]  He washed my flipper.

  Mr. Krabs : He owes me money!

  Squidward Tentacles : He made me provide excellent service.

  Scooter : [appears with a halo and angel clothing on]  Dudes, he made me experience high tide.

  [floats up towards the surface while laughing] 

  Tom : He poisoned our water supply, burned our crops and delivered a plague unto our houses!

  Protesters : He did?

  Tom : No, but are we just gonna wait around until he does?

• SpongeBob SquarePants : Bubble Buddy's thirsty.

  Squidward Tentacles : How about a glass of our finest shampoo?

  [laughs] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Sounds great.

  [Squidward stops laughing and goes to get the shampoo] 

  Squidward Tentacles : Here's your hair product, sir.

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Bubble Buddy likes bendy straws.

  [Squidward bends the straw with repressed rage] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Huh, what's that? Bubble Buddy says it tastes funny. What do you think?

  Squidward Tentacles : Mr. Krabs!

  Mr. Eugene H. Krabs : [chews the food for an elderly custormer]  Think of the customer.

  Squidward Tentacles : [Tastes shampoo]  Oh, silly me. I brought the diet shampoo.

• Squidward Tentacles : He's an inanimate object. His money's no good here.

  Mr. Eugene H. Krabs : [Comes out of the cash register]  What are you saying, Mr. Squidward? Everyone's money is good here.

  [Cut to an escaped convict eating a Krabbby Patty] 

  Mr. Eugene H. Krabs : At the Krusty Krab, we serves all kinds.

  Squidward Tentacles : Mr. Krabs, I'm not taking an order for a bubble!

  Mr. Eugene H. Krabs : Sure you are, or I'll fill your life with misery and woe.

  [Goes back inside the register, then pops out again] 

  Mr. Eugene H. Krabs : Even if you quit.

• Squidward Tentacles : [passive-aggressively]  Here, one of everything! No cheese, no crust, pickles to the left, four squirts of ketchup, wheat buns, non-dairy lettuce, and farm-raised tomatoes carnival-style!

  [He sets a miniature ferris wheel with miniature patties on the table] 

  Squidward Tentacles : And if there's anything else I can do, please hesitate to ask.

• SpongeBob SquarePants : [inspecting Bubble Buddy's patty]  Oh, no, Squidward! Wait! There's cheese on these patties!

  Squidward Tentacles : And?

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Bubble Buddy's lactose intolerant!

  [Squidward furrows his brow in bewilderment. The little wheels turn in his head as he tries to comprehend how he's just heard something that stupid] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : He can't eat cheese! What should we do?

  Squidward Tentacles : We? How about you take these patties and sh...

  Mr. Eugene H. Krabs : Mr. Squidward!

  [Squidward sullenly walks off with the patties to make a fresh batch]