Stargate SG-1 (TV Series)

Demons (1999)

Richard Dean Anderson: Colonel Jack O'Neill

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jack O'Neill : Major, next time Daniel gets the urge to help someone, shoot him.

• Teal'c : I know of no Goa'uld capable of showing the necessary compassion or benevolence that I've read of in your bible.

  Jack O'Neill : You read the bible Teal'c?

  Teal'c : It is a significant part of your western culture. Have you not read the bible O'Neill?

  Jack O'Neill : Oh yeah, yeah... not all of it. Actually I'm listening to it on tape. Don't tell me how it ends.

• Jack O'Neill : Carter, if I ever get the urge to help anybody again, feel free to give me a swift kick.

• Jack O'Neill : [shouts at Teal'C's stomach]  Way to go Junior!

• Dr. Daniel Jackson : It was a procedure often done in the Middle Ages. They... well, they-they'd drill a hole in the person's head. By drilling a hole the evil spirits are released, thus saving the person from eternal damnation.

  Jack O'Neill : Thus *saving* the person?

  Dr. Daniel Jackson : Well, they didn't call them the Dark Ages because it was dark.

• Jack O'Neill : So... . how long are you gonna keep this up? The demon bit, don't get me wrong, looks like a great gig, you got the Padre in your back pocket, the hours are good, probably get all the chicks, huh?

• Simon : I am sorry Mary.

  Jack O'Neill : Don't apologize to her, help her.

  Simon : The Canon has spoken.

  Jack O'Neill : What are you, the village idiot?

• Jack O'Neill : Unas, what does Sokar have on you that makes you so- dang- *cranky*?

• Jack O'Neill : SPOILER:

  [frightened villagers run away after Teal'c, whose body they were preparing for burial, sits up] 

  Jack O'Neill : You'd think they never saw a guy rise from the dead.

• Dr. Daniel Jackson : That means that the Stargate is still in use by someone.

  Jack O'Neill : [putting his pinky finger to the side of his lip à la Dr. Evil from] 

  [link=tt0118655] 

  Jack O'Neill : ] Or some*thing.*