- Jack O'Neill: Jaffa jokes? Let's hear one of them.
- Teal'c: I shall attempt to translate one, O'Neill.
- [Teal'c thinks]
- Teal'c: A Serpent guard, a Horus guard and a Setesh guard meet on a neutral planet. It is a tense moment. The Serpent guard's eyes glow. The Horus guard's beak glistens. The Setesh guard's nose drips.
- [Teal'c breaks into boisterous laughter, but he's the only one]
- [Trying to infiltrate Seth's cult]
- Jack O'Neill: Dare I ask about the men inside the compound?
- Dr. Daniel Jackson: They were turned into eunuchs.
- Jack O'Neill: Eunuchs, as in "snippity-do-dah"?
- Jacob Carter/Selmak: So, you guys are the talk of the Tok'ra water cooler.
- Jack O'Neill: For what?
- Jacob Carter/Selmak: Kickin' some major Hathor behind.
- Jack O'Neill: Yes. We do take pride in good work.
- [Carter has just killed Seth with a Goa'uld hand device]
- Dr. Daniel Jackson: You killed him.
- Jack O'Neill: [In an undertone] Hail, Dorothy.
- Dr. Daniel Jackson: I did a time-line Boolean search for religion, cult, Set, Setesh, Setekh, Seth...
- Jack O'Neill: [interrupts] Yadda...
- Special Agent James Hamner: You wanna tell me what interest the Air Force has here?
- Jack O'Neill: That would be classified.
- Special Agent James Hamner: You guys special forces?
- Jack O'Neill: Also classified.
- Special Agent James Hamner: I was talking to your commanding officer, Colonel.
- Jacob Carter/Selmak: He's right, it's classified.
- Special Agent James Hamner: I have top level clearance.
- Jack O'Neill: Oh, not top enough.
- Special Agent James Hamner: You have a rather insubordinate subordinate, General.
- Jacob Carter/Selmak: He's not insubordinate to me. Only to people such as yourself. Saves me the trouble.
- Special Agent James Hamner: You want to tell me what's going on?
- Jack O'Neill: Didn't you say you know more than I do?
- Special Agent James Hamner: Apparently not. I just got off the phone with the President.
- Jack O'Neill: Of the Unites States of America? Sweet! How's he doing?
- Special Agent James Hamner: He seems to have a thing for you.
- Jack O'Neill: Yeah, well, you know...
- Special Agent James Hamner: In fact I'm to issue an emergency Special Agent credential. He's put you in charge of this operation.
- Jack O'Neill: Excellent! My first order of business... get me one of those cool jackets.
- Seth: Who are you?
- Jack O'Neill: Well I'm Larry, this is Moe and of course, everyone's favorite, Curly.