Veronica Mars (TV Series)

Pilot (2004)

Francis Capra: Eli 'Weevil' Navarro

Quotes 

• Weevil : Sister, the only time I care what a woman has to say is when she's riding my big old hog. But even then, it's not so much words - just a bunch of 'oohs' and 'aahs,' you know?

  Veronica Mars : So it's big, huh?

  Weevil : Legendary.

  Veronica Mars : Well, let's see it. I mean, if it's as big as you say, I'll be your girlfriend.

  [gasps] 

  Veronica Mars : We could go to prom together! What? What seems to be the problem? I'm on a schedule here, vato.

  Felix Toombs : Dude, Weevil, don't let blondie talk to you like that.

  Veronica Mars : Sounds like your buddy here wants to see it, too.

  Felix Toombs : Oh hell, I'll show you mine!

• Weevil : [Threatening]  Say you're sorry.

  Logan : Rub a lamp.

• Weevil : So that, uh, surveillance tape just... poof?

  Veronica Mars : That's fortunate.

• Weevil : All right, one week. After that we come for you, your boy and your little dog too.

• Weevil : All right, all right, all right. Felix, we get it. You're a badass, okay? But for once, don't be stupid.