- President Josiah Bartlet: What plaid-flannel-wearing cheese-eating yahoo of a milkman governor signed that idiot bill into state law?
- Charlie Young: [looks uncomfortable and doesn't answer]
- President Josiah Bartlet: It was me, wasn't it?
- Charlie Young: Yes, sir.
- Leo McGarry: Andrew Jackson in the main foyer of the White House had a two-ton block of cheese.
- Josh Lyman: And a Wheat Thin the size of Lake Tahoe.
- Toby Ziegler: In my day, we knew how to protest.
- C.J. Cregg: What day was that?
- Toby Ziegler: 1968.
- Josh Lyman: How the hell old were you when you were protesting?
- Toby Ziegler: My sisters took me.
- [beat]
- Toby Ziegler: Anybody got a problem with that?
- C.J. Cregg: No cameras.
- Toby Ziegler: You negotiated that?
- C.J. Cregg: Yeah.
- Toby Ziegler: And they agreed to it?
- C.J. Cregg: You want to make out with me right now, don't you?
- Toby Ziegler: Well, when don't I?
- Leo McGarry: Little thing called team morale, Josh. You gotta make people feel good about themselves.
- Leo McGarry: [walks into conference room where the staff is waiting to begin Big Block Of Cheese Day] All right! Shut the hell up everybody. I've fired more people than you before breakfast.
- Toby Ziegler: It's activist vacation, is what it is. Spring break for anarchist wannabes. The black t-shirts, the gas masks? Fashion accessories.
- Officer Rhonda Sachs: [sarcastic] These kids today with the hair and the clothes.
- Toby Ziegler: Alright, that's it flatfoot.
- Officer Rhonda Sachs: I got great feet.
- Toby Ziegler: You want to know the benefits of free trade? Food is cheaper.
- Officer Rhonda Sachs: Yes.
- Toby Ziegler: Food is cheaper! Clothes are cheaper. Steel is cheaper. Cars are cheaper. Phone service is cheaper. You feel me building a rhythm here? That's because I'm a speech writer - I know how to make a point.
- Officer Rhonda Sachs: Toby...
- Toby Ziegler: It lowers prices, it raises income. You see what I did with 'lowers' and 'raises' there?
- Officer Rhonda Sachs: Yes.
- Toby Ziegler: It's called the science of listener attention. We did repetition, we did floating opposites, and now you end with the one that's not like the others. Ready? Free trade stops wars. Heh, and that's it. Free trade stops wars! And we figure out a way to fix the rest. One world, one peace - I'm sure I've seen that on a sign somewhere.
- Officer Rhonda Sachs: [sarcastic] God, Toby. Wouldn't it be great if there was someone around with the communication skills who could go in there and tell them that?
- Toby Ziegler: [beat] Shut up.
- C.J. Cregg: Yeah, but you can't do that.
- Dr. John Fallow: Why not?
- C.J. Cregg: 'Cause it's freaking me out.
- Toby Ziegler: We had the underground. We had rapid response.
- C.J. Cregg: And, by God, you were home by supper on a school night.
- Sam Seaborn: Secret Memorandum on the US negotiating stance at Yalta.
- Donna Moss: Please stop walking
- Sam Seaborn: Good 'cause Stalin needed an advantage, and we wanted a fair fight.
- Donna Moss: Sam, nothing good comes from telling her
- Sam Seaborn: The truth isn't good?
- Donna Moss: Not right now, no. The grandfather is not going to live another 3 months, let it go till then.
- Sam Seaborn: I'm not her fairy godmother, she asked me to look into this.
- Donna Moss: I'm saying you wait 3 months until...
- Sam Seaborn: Hey!
- Donna Moss: You're in a bad...
- Sam Seaborn: Donna!
- Donna Moss: Listen to me! Your in a bad place right now. And you shouldn't make this decision. If you don't tell her tonight, you can tell her tomorrow. If you tell her tonight, that's it.
- Sam Seaborn: Donna.
- Donna Moss: It was people pushing paper around 50 years ago. Why does it matter?
- Sam Seaborn: It was high treason, and it mattered a great deal! This country is an idea, and one that's lit the world for two centuries and treason against that idea is not just a crime against the living! This ground holds the graves of people who died for it, who gave what Lincoln called the last full measure of devotion, of fidelity.
- Sam Seaborn: You understand that last full measure devotion to, treason against them is.
- Donna Moss: Sam...
- Sam Seaborn: There was translator in the Hungarian Trade mission named Shabademschki, she was murdered in 1952. She was about to reveal the name of a soviet agent called Blackwater.
- Nancy McNally: I'm the only woman on a conference call. Delaney can't tell when it's me talking. Do I have a bizarrely androgynous voice?
- Stephanie Gault: Believe it or not, I advise the WTO in certain areas of macroeconomics. So a global monetary crisis can't be very far off.
- [the West Wing staffers have started trying to trade their assignments for "Big Block of Cheese Day"]
- Larry: Excuse me, C.J., I got NIH research funding for cancer treatment using shark cartilage, if you want to trade.
- Ed: I'll take that.
- Larry: What do you got?
- Ed: Citizens for D.C. Statehood.
- Larry: Forget it.
- Donna Moss: I've got the Kemp's Ridley Sea Turtle Society, but I'm keeping it.
- Leo McGarry: You're all keeping it. I'm sure Margaret worked long and hard to make sure that the appropriate petitioner went to the appropriate staffer.
- [Margaret, standing behind Leo, shakes her head 'no'. Leo turns around, and she nods her head 'yes']