South Park (TV Series)

Free Hat (2002)

Trey Parker: Stan Marsh, Eric Cartman, Trailer Voice Over, Mr. Tweek, Skeeter, Ted Koppel, Steven Spielberg, Security Guard #1, Self, Man in Crowd #5, Excess Hollywood Presenter, Lawrence Kasdan, Man at Premiere #1, Man at Premiere #3, Party Host, Hat McCullen

Quotes 

• Voiceover : Coming, this summer! It's the digitally enhanced re-release of the very first pilot episode of South Park! Yes, the classic, rough, hand-made first episode is getting a make-over for 2002! The simple, funny aliens are now super badass and cool! Flying saucer? No longer cheap construction paper, but a 4.0 megapixel constructed through a masterpiece of technology! Everything's new! New is better!

  Trey Parker : When we first made South Park, we didn't wanna use construction paper. We just had to because it was cheap.

  Matt Stone : And now with new technology we can finally remaster South Park, make it look sharp, clean and focused.

  Trey Parker : Expensive.

  Voiceover : Yes, all the charm of a simple little cartoon will melt before your eyes as it is replaced by newer and more standardized animation!

  Trey Parker : For instance, in the scene at the bus stop, we always meant to have Imperial walkers and giant dewback lizards in the background, but simply couldn't afford it.

  Voiceover : Get this special enhanced version quick, because another enhanced version will likely be coming out for 2003!

• Cartman : Never underestimate the power of a free hat.

• Stan Marsh : It's just that, you know, he killed 23 babies.

  Man in crowd : Well, yeah, but it was in self defense.

  Crowd : Yeah!

  Cartman : He killed 23 babies in self defense?

  Skeeter : Hat was attacked maliciously and unprovoked by a gang of babies in West Town Park. When that many babies get together, they can be like piranha.