SpongeBob SquarePants (TV Series)

Hall Monitor/Jellyfish Jam (1999)

Tom Kenny: SpongeBob SquarePants, Gary, Jellyfish, Narrator, Bill

Photos 

Quotes 

• [SpongeBob has a jellyfish on a leash] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Hey, Squidward. Meet my new pet.

  Squidward : That's no pet. That's a wild animal.

  SpongeBob SquarePants : No he isn't. He can do tricks.

  [Throwing a stick] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Fetch!

  [Jellyfish fetches stick] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : [holding up three fingers]  How many fingers am I holding up?

  [Jellyfish buzzes three times] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Play dead!

  [Jellyfish is buried under a tombstone, then comes out] 

  Squidward : I wouldn't let that thing in my house even if it was potty-trained.

  [Jellyfish is sitting on a toilet, reading the newspaper and humming] 

  Squidward : I didn't need to see that.

• [SpongeBob is assigned hall monitor] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Yahoo! Hall monitor SpongeBob reporting for duty! I am ready to take my position... IN THE HALL! I will protect all those who are weak... IN THE HALL! All laws will be enforced... IN THE HALL!

• SpongeBob SquarePants : It is our duty to bring this maniac to justice, but how to procede? Listen, deputy. You're an ex-criminal. What would you do?

  Patrick : Hmmm... I'd get an ice cream.

  [Cut to SpongeBob and Patrick coming out of an ice-cream parlor] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Okay, now what?

  Patrick : Hmmm...

  [Cut to SpongeBob and Patrick coming out of the ice-cream parlor again] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : This isn't working.

• [sees SpongeBob in the distance; mistakes him for the Maniac] 

  Patrick : [On walkie-talkie]  SpongeBob! I see him!

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Where is he?

  Patrick : At the intersection of Conch and Coral.

  SpongeBob SquarePants : That's where I am! He's right on top of me, but I can't see him! What's he doing?

  Patrick : He's just standing there... menacingly! Get out of there, SpongeBob!

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Yaaah!

  Patrick : That's his maniac shriek! He's going to attack!

  [SpongeBob runs around in circles, crying] 

  Patrick : He's acting all crazy! Run, SpongeBob, run! Quick, hide behind that building! No, wait! He just ran by that building! Hide behind that street sign! No, wait! The maniac just went by that sign! Get underneath that street light! No! He's there too! Run for your life!

  [SpongeBob dives inside a mailbox; inside, he hears Patrick on the walkie-talkie, intercut by static] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Say that again, deputy?

  Patrick : The maniac's in the mailbox!

  [SpongeBob screams and runs off] 

• Narrator : SpongeBob has learned one of the sea's harshest lessons: Wild animals can throw really wild parties.

• SpongeBob SquarePants : [patrolling the streets as hall monitor, he sees a couple inside a house]  An open window!

  Female Fish : More seaweed medley, dear?

  SpongeBob SquarePants : They've left themselves susceptible to danger. I must teach them the error of their ways... through example.

  [SpongeBob jumps through the window wearing a ski mask] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Yaaah! I'm the open window maniac!

  [the couple run out the door] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : I hope you learned a valuable lesson.

• Patrick : Hi, SpongeBob.

  SpongeBob : That's "Hall Monitor" to you.

  Patrick : Sorry, officer.

  SpongeBob : Sorry's not good enough, Patrick. You've commited a crime, and I'm taking you in.

  Patrick : What crime?

  [SpongeBob points at the ice cream cone Patrick dropped on the ground] 

  Patrick : [crying]  I'm a bad person!

• Mrs. Puff : [On the TV screen when she's in jail after not being responsible for the crimes]  In conclusion, class, red means stop, green means go, and... . Spongebob.

  SpongeBob SquarePants : [nervously]  Yes, Mrs. Puff?

  Mrs. Puff : I'd like to see you after class, 6 months from now.