36
Metascore
29 reviews · Provided by Metacritic.com
- 70Village VoiceVillage VoiceSqueamish types may balk, but the gory cruelty on display here is faithful to the source material and deeply thrilling.
- 60Time OutKeith UhlichTime OutKeith UhlichThe film's secret weapon proves to be Freddy Krueger–fingernailed witch Marique, whom Rose McGowan plays with the kind of fuck-it-all brio - imagine a cross between Madeline Kahn in "History of the World: Part I" and Lady Gaga - that should garner her a Razzie and an Oscar.
- 50Orlando SentinelRoger MooreOrlando SentinelRoger MooreTake away much of the myth, most of the sorcery and all of the humor of the 1982 John Milius-Arnold Schwarzenegger version of the sword and sorcery epic "Conan the Barbarian" and you've got an idea what the new "Conan" is like.
- 50Entertainment WeeklyLisa SchwarzbaumEntertainment WeeklyLisa SchwarzbaumThere's something and nothing for everyone in Conan the Barbarian 3D.
- The bigger problem is that the action literally bleeds together and there's no sense of pacing.
- 38Chicago Sun-TimesRoger EbertChicago Sun-TimesRoger EbertA brutal, crude, witless high-tech CGI contrivance, in which no artificial technique has been overlooked, including 3-D.
- 30The Hollywood ReporterKirk HoneycuttThe Hollywood ReporterKirk HoneycuttThere is no purpose to the film other than random blood splattering amid scenes of bondage, primitive savagery and S&M eroticism. The film is numbing and dumb with its hero indistinguishable from its villains.
- 30Arizona RepublicBill GoodykoontzArizona RepublicBill GoodykoontzThere's just not a lot to like here, with the exception of what may be one of the all-time best bad movie lines, one Conan utters to Tamara as a kind of personal credo: "I live. I love. I slay. I am content."
- 25Slant MagazineSlant MagazineThe re-whatevered Conan the Barbarian feels unexpectedly low-rent, even with its multi-million-dollar backdrops and ear-splitting, rumbling soundtrack and (presumably post-converted) 3D imagery.