Weeds (TV Series)

Mrs. Botwin's Neighborhood (2006)

Mary-Louise Parker: Nancy Botwin

Photos 

Quotes 

• Silas Botwin : Why do you have a home pregnancy test?

  Nancy Botwin : D-do you *want* me to kill you?

• Nancy Botwin : [about Megan being pregnant]  How did this happen?

  Silas Botwin : You don't wanna hear it.

  Nancy Botwin : Oh, but I really do.

  Silas Botwin : If I had to bet on it, I'd say it was three weeks ago in my room. Doggy style. When I pulled out the condom was gone. Megan has really strong muscles, must've sucked the thing right off.

  Nancy Botwin : Ah-ahh. Stop, stop, stop.

  Silas Botwin : You asked. You want to be the cool Mom.

  Nancy Botwin : No. No, I don't. There are a million things in this world I want to be. 'Cool Mom,' nowhere on that list.

  Silas Botwin : [Megan shows her the pregnancy test; positive]  Well, I hope Grandma's on that list.

• [Celia and Nancy are having a disagreement about Nancy's half-hearted work on Celia's campaign for City Council] 

  Celia Hodes : ...If you can't make time for the pressing problems of greater Agrestic...

  Nancy Botwin : That's exactly it - I can't make time. I've got problems at home.

  [starts for the door] 

  Celia Hodes : [with a concerned look on her face, Celia follows]  Really? Do you wanna' talk about it?

  Nancy Botwin : I don't wanna' talk about it. i just wanna' go home.

  Celia Hodes : Ya' know, I tell you about my husband's unemployment, my daughter being the face of America's trans fat...so...tell me what's going on with you? Please? Nancy...

  Nancy Botwin : [not wanting to hurt her feelings]  ...Celia...

  Celia Hodes : Aren't we friends?

  Nancy Botwin : I just wanna' go!

  Celia Hodes : [disappointed]  You can't even say it. You don't want to be my friend!

  Nancy Botwin : [gestures toward Celia]  Everything is not about you, Celia!

  [Nancy turns to leave. As she walks away, Celia reaches out, grabs Nancy's hair from behind and gives it a hard tug before letting go] 

  Nancy Botwin : [turns around totally shocked, yells]  What the fuck are you doing??

  Celia Hodes : [grabbing Nancy's hair again with a desparate look on her face]  Be my friend!

  [the two begin to twirl in a circle, Celia pulling Nancy's hair while Nancy grabs Celia's arm trying to make her let go] 

  Nancy Botwin : Oww!! Let go of my fucking hair...

  Celia Hodes : Be my friend!!!

  Nancy Botwin : [nearly frantic]  Let go of my fucking hairrrr!

  Celia Hodes : [just as frantic]  Be my Goddamned motherfucking friendddd!!!!!

  Nancy Botwin : Owwww!!!

  [when Celia finally lets go, Nancy quickly gets to the front door] 

  Nancy Botwin : Your insane!

  Celia Hodes : [lowering her voice as she repeats]  Selfish! Selfish! Selfish!

  [the two women glare at each other in mutual shock for a moment, then Nancy walks out] 

  Pam : [in the cheeriest voice imaginable]  You two are just like sisters!