- SpongeBob SquarePants: Hello, Mr. Krabs. Are you ready to party?
- Mr. Krabs: I'm ready to party! Are you ready to party, SpongeBob?
- SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm ready to party! Are you ready to party, Patrick?
- Patrick Star: I'm ready to party! Are you ready to party, SpongeBob?
- SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm ready to party! Are you ready to party, Mr. Krabs?
- Mr. Krabs: I'm ready to par-tay! Are you ready to par-tay, SpongeBob?
- SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm ready to par-tay! Are you ready to par-tay?
- Patrick Star: I'm ready to party! Are you ready to party?
- SpongeBob SquarePants: I'm ready to party! Are you ready to party, Mr. Krabs?
- Mr. Krabs: I'm ready to par...
- Pearl Krabs: Stop it! Stop it, dad! You're embarrassing me!
- SpongeBob SquarePants: [to Gary] Looks like training is gonna start early, ladies. I called you a lady to humiliate and demean you. It's a motivational tool we coaches use.
- [Elsewhere in Bikini Bottom]
- Sandy Cheeks: Hmm. I don't know why, but I think I'll kick SpongeBob's butt tomorrow.
- Patrick Star: [Holds a rock] Hey, SpongeBob. Check out my new snail.
- SpongeBob SquarePants: Patrick, your snail is a rock.
- Patrick Star: Yeah, thanks, I know. He's got nerves of steel.
- Mr. Krabs: Pearl, do you think I'm old?
- Pearl Krabs: Well, of course I do. But that's okay. Daddies are supposed to be old.
- Mr. Krabs: But I'm still cool, right? Your old man is cool?
- Pearl Krabs: See, no one says "cool" anymore. That's such an old person thing. Now we say "coral", as in "That nose job is so coral."
- Mr. Krabs: Coral, eh?
- Pearl Krabs: Eww! When you say it, it sounds so uncoral.
- Mr. Krabs: What if I said it with a different inflection? Cor-ral.
- Pearl Krabs: Don't you have to go to work or something, dad?
- Mr. Krabs: Oop, you're right! Have a coral day, honey.
- Pearl Krabs: [On cell phone] Jenny? It's Pearl. Coral is definitely out.
- [Gary collapses from exhaustion at the Snail Race]
- SpongeBob SquarePants: Oh Gary, I'm sorry! Why didn't you just say I was pushing you too hard?
- Gary: Meow.
- SpongeBob SquarePants: You did? Oh Gary! Why didn't you tell me I wasn't listening?
- Gary: Meow.
- SpongeBob SquarePants: You did?
- Referee fish: Are you guys ready?
- Patrick Star: Ah! A burglar!
- SpongeBob SquarePants: No, Patrick, that's the official.
- Patrick Star: Oh.
- Sandy Cheeks: [Kicks SpongeBob in the rear at the end of "The Great Snail Race"]
- [yelling at the top of her lungs]
- Sandy Cheeks: THAT'S FOR YESTERDAY SQUAREPANTS!
- Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, I like looking at delicates as much as the next guy, but I thought we were gonna see more of the nightlife. You know, something that'll give me that wild and crazy feeling, if you know what I mean.
- SpongeBob SquarePants: Oh, I know what you mean, Mr. Krabs. This is just stop numero uno of our night of debauchery!
- Patrick Star: Debauchery!
- Mr. Krabs: Debauchery!
- [Cut to Krabs, SpongeBob and Patrick picking up trash at a highway pass]
- Mr. Krabs: Debauchery? I've never thought of picking up trash on a highway overpass as wild, but if it's what the kids are into...
- SpongeBob SquarePants: Good morning, world! I'm ready!
- [Camera pans away from SpongeBob]
- SpongeBob SquarePants: World?
- Mr. Krabs: You guys wouldn't know a good time if it bit you in the aft end!
- [leaves Bunny Buns]
- Mr. Krabs: I'm going home! You guys ain't cool. You're lame!
- SpongeBob SquarePants: [appalled] "Lame?"
- Mr. Krabs: LAME! You're nerds! Geeks! Creeps! And babies!
- SpongeBob SquarePants, Patrick Star: Not "babies!"
- [both Spongebob and Patrick suck their thumbs]
- Mr. Krabs: I may be old, but even an old bag of shells like me knows that you haven't suggested one cool thing all night! So good night to ya!
- [Squidward's purebred snail, Snellie, lost the snail race to Patrick's pet rock, Rocky]
- Patrick Star: [holding up the trophy he won] Don't worry, Squidward, I know how much you wanted to win, so I had the trophy engraved to you.
- Squidward Tentacles: Gosh, Patrick, thanks.
- [reads the engraving]
- Squidward Tentacles: "The 1st Place Snail Racing Cup Presented to Squidward..."
- [he notices that his last name has been misspelled as...]
- Squidward Tentacles: "... *Tortellini*"? Will I ever win?
- [He good-naturedly laughs it off along with SpongeBob and Patrick]
- SpongeBob: [Opens a can of Strongman Powder; as he pours into a blender] Kelp powder for muscle mass.
- SpongeBob: [Shows Gary; before dropping into a mixture] Raw eggs, 'cause were cliché.
- SpongeBob: [as he pours out a box of those pieces in 4, 5, 5, 2; 16 in total] ... And nails for toughness.
- [SpongeBob drops 9 pieces of nails into a mixture, puts on a top and blends the mixture into a drink on a blender]
- Gary: Meow?
- SpongeBob: Of course, I expect you to eat this.
- [Gary eyes widens]
- SpongeBob: [pours his drink into a cup for Gary] It's scientifically designed to help you win tomorrow. Gary?
- [Gary lefts the kitchen to watch a comedy show on a living room TV]
- SpongeBob: [stops his pocket watch as the music ends] Wow. Pretty good time.
- SpongeBob SquarePants: [SpongeBob and Mr Krabs are on coin-operated kiddie rides at the Barg 'N Mart] Are you feeling it now, Mr. Krabs? Are you feeling it now, Mr. Krabs?
- Patrick Star: I'm feeling it, SpongeBob.
- SpongeBob SquarePants: Patrick, that's not a ride.
- Fish #41: [Patrick is riding on some guy's shoulders while the guy is pushing his shopping cart] Get off of me!
- Mr. Krabs: So you want to know if I can feel it?
- SpongeBob SquarePants, Patrick Star: Yeah!
- Mr. Krabs: Do you really want to know if I can feel it?
- SpongeBob SquarePants, Patrick Star: Yeah, yeah!
- Mr. Krabs: Because I can feel it. Do you want to know what I'm feeling?
- SpongeBob SquarePants, Patrick Star: Yes!
- Mr. Krabs: [becaomes very angry he explodes] I'M FEELING LIKE A TOTAL BARNACLE HEAD!