- Martha O'Dell: How are you different from your mother?
- Harriet Hayes: I hope in as few ways as possible.
- Martha O'Dell: Would you have a problem doing a sketch about pre-marital sex?
- Harriet Hayes: I don't even have a problem HAVING pre-marital sex!
- Tom Jeter: [Entering Matt's office wearing a lobster costume] Excuse me. Wardrobe wanted you to approve this.
- Matt Albie: Yeah, it's good.
- [Tom turns to leave]
- Matt Albie: Hang on. It's supposed to be a lobster costume, right?
- Tom Jeter: Yeah.
- Matt Albie: Yeah, then it's fine.
- Danny Tripp: You know what we're gonna do at the wrap party? We're gonna find you your rebound girl. An intermezzo, a cleansing of the palate. We're not looking for a girl with a Ph.D. in string theory or anything, okay? There'll be at least half a dozen women there who've been on the cover of FHM. That's what's for you right now.
- Matt Albie: Really?
- Danny Tripp: Trust me, trust my face.
- Matt Albie: You are...?
- Danny Tripp: Twice divorced.
- Matt Albie: You have...?
- Danny Tripp: No one in my life at the moment.
- Matt Albie: And you haven't for...?
- Danny Tripp: Quite some time.
- Matt Albie: Okay.