South Park (TV Series)

Miss Teacher Bangs a Boy (2006)

Jessica Makinson: Ike Broflovski

Quotes 

• [Cartman is walking down the hall as hall monitor, and a kid passes behind him. He immediately turns around and points at him] 

  Eric Cartman : HALL PASS!

  Various : Whaa?

  Eric Cartman : [Holding him up to a locker and holding up a can of bear mace]  YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS? THIS IS BEAR MACE, FAGGOT! NOW GIMMIE YOUR HALL PASS, NOW!

  Various : It's right here!

  [shows him hall pass] 

  Eric Cartman : Okay you're cool, man, go with Christ.

  Various : What? You can't just come up to me and...

  Eric Cartman : [kicks him sharply aside] 

• Miss Stevenson : Hold on, please. You don't understand!

  Kyle : Really? What's there not to understand?

  Miss Stevenson : Your brother and I are in love.

  Kyle : He's a little young, don't you think?

  Ike Broflovski : Oh!

  Miss Stevenson : Ike is very mature for his age and you know it.

  Ike Broflovski : Ring around the roses.

  Miss Stevenson : He makes me feel like nobody else does. He loves me and only me and I know I'm a goddess to him. When we make love, he can give it to me hard or soft and...

  Kyle : Alright! We're getting the hell out of here!

  Ike Broflovski : No, no, no, no, no, no!

  Kyle : Ike, you can't possibly want this. We have to tell Mom.

  Ike Broflovski : [starts crying] 

  Kyle : Ike!

  Miss Stevenson : Is it so hard to believe that true love exists?

  Kyle : [after a pause]  This is nuts.