30 Rock (TV Series)

Ludachristmas (2007)

Alec Baldwin: Jack Donaghy

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jack Donaghy : [Reaching for the restaurant check]  Now, Dick, let me get...

  Dick Lemon : Ahh-ah-ah Jack, it's on me. Wouldn't be a Lemon party without old Dick!

• [Liz's brother Mitch had an accident as a teenager and believes it's still 1985] 

  Jack Donaghy : Oh in his mind Reagan is still President?

  Jack Donaghy : [to Mitch]  You lucky bastard.

• Liz Lemon : Nice to have some positive reinforcement, isn't it?

  Jack Donaghy : Well, it's only positive reinforcement when they say it to you. In my case they're just stating the facts. I do look like the Arrow shirt man, I did lace up my skates professionally and I did do a fabulous job finishing my muffin.

• Jack Donaghy : See mother, not all species eat their young.

• Jack Donaghy : Mother, I'm sorry, but the Lemons invited me out, and I couldn't say no. They're very nice people.

  Colleen Donaghy : Oh, nice. I'll show you nice. Let's all meet down at the soda shop while this country turns into Mexico.

  Jack Donaghy : Now, you see, they don't say things like that. They're very polite to each other.

  Colleen Donaghy : I suppose you think that they're more nurturing than I am.

  Jack Donaghy : Mother, there are terrorist cells that are more nurturing than you are.

  Colleen Donaghy : Be careful. I'll cry. You give me 10 minutes with the Lemon family and I'll have them tearing at each other like drag queens at a wig sale.

• Margaret Lemon : Knock knock! It's just the Lemons. We've come to drop off a little goodbye present.

  Jack Donaghy : Oh, thank you!

  Margaret Lemon : Oh, my goodness! What a beautiful office. Oh, your mother must be so proud of you.

  Dick Lemon : Wow, look at this carpet. I feel like we should take off our shoes. Should we take off our shoes?

  Jack Donaghy : No, please sit down and make yourselves comfortable.

  Margaret Lemon : Well, we don't want to bother you. We know you must have big plans.

  Jack Donaghy : Well, I was going to drive up to Vermont and visit my girlfriend, C.C.

  Margaret Lemon : Oh, I love that name, C.C!

  Dick Lemon : Ooh, I'll bet any girlfriend of yours is a real winner.

  Jack Donaghy : Well, she is a congresswoman.

  Margaret Lemon : Oh, my goodness!

  Dick Lemon : A congresswoman!

  Jack Donaghy : And she does have her own Lifetime movie.

  Margaret Lemon : Lifetime! Wowsers!

  Jack Donaghy : Why don't we cut the charade and you two tell me what exactly it is you want from me.

  Dick Lemon , Margaret Lemon : [shocked pause, then they burst out laughing] 

• Mitch Lemon : [poses in chair]  Hey, Dad, take my picture. Look, I'm the lady from "Flashdance!"

  Margaret Lemon : That's a good flashdance, honey.

  Jack Donaghy : [whispers to Liz]  "Good flashdance."

• Jack Donaghy : What did your mother mean when she said that you were a beautiful genius? Was she taunting you?

• Colleen Donaghy : Let's change the subject. Politics.

  Dick Lemon : We don't discuss that stuff. Life is too short.

  Jack Donaghy : Really? Life is too short?

  [whispers to Colleen] 

  Jack Donaghy : Because your life seems endless.