In a previous review I stated that the cast of certain mockbusters unconsciously reminded me of " adult films " . 30,000 LEAGUES UNDER THE SEA continues this trend . We're introduced to haughty , arrogant , abrasive Lt Commander Conseil played by Natalie Stone . I don't know why , perhaps it was her grating accent and the fact her face is caked in make up that I just expected her navy colleagues to say something along the lines of " Okay baby you gonna need to lighten up and I've just got the thing for it " . Cue clothes being ripped off , grunting and groaning and body fluids being splashed everywhere . This never happens , though if it did it might have made the film more watchable
There's a few problems with this mockbuster . The acting is totally wooden , you're never convinced that the characters are USN sailors or that the action is taking place outside of a very small studio set but worst of all nothing really happens . The main plot revolves around a small team of US Navy personnel trying to find out what has happened to a nuclear sub , they get captured by Captain Nemo and spend the next hour talking . Yes it's the same Captain Nemo created by Jules Verne and most famously portrayed by James Mason . Remember in the book and Disney version he was bitterly misanthropic ? Well here he's someone who walks around corridors that look suspiciously like a small film set not saying or doing anything of any importance . Apparently he also steals some trident missiles to zap a few countries . Why ? Apparently because ... well ... well ... just because
Character motivation is not the strong point of this movie . The nearest we get is Lt Commander Conseil smiling at the end which absolutely shocked me because it meant Ms Stone doubled the number of expressions she gave in the entire film . Nor is it a film that will be known for its heart thumping action sequences because there aren't any . Say what you like about The Asylum film company but they usually have several action scenes in their movies . Okay they're usually composed of dire CGI and must have cost all of 17 cents but at least they try to make things entertaining no matter how badly they fail . Here no one even seems to be trying