- [Shirley and Mr. Howie are attending a toga party at Sussex Academy]
- Shirley Holmes: Interesting look, Mr. Howie.
- Arthur Howie: Et tu, Miss Holmes?
- Molly Hardy: Birdwatching?
- Francis Boris 'Bo' Sawchuk: What are you doing here?
- Shirley Holmes: Molly has her own perverse resons for wanting Ms. Stratmann to stay. If Kemp becomes principal, it's game over for her.
- Molly Hardy: Please. The game is only over when I say it is.
- [Bo rejects Shirley's diagnosis of hypomania when he sees his school's principal walking hand in hand with a good-looking middle-aged man]
- Francis Boris 'Bo' Sawchuk: Hypomania, a gradual onset of 10 to 14 days? Oh, man.
- Shirley Holmes: What?
- Francis Boris 'Bo' Sawchuk: Shirley, she's leaving Sussex because she's got a guy.
- Molly Hardy: An old guy - but a guy.
- Brian: Old Mother Hubbard went to the cupboard and it was full of money. When she sells, Stratmann will be wroth a quarter of a million.
- [Shirley and Bo listen to Kemp's conversation on their hidden microphone]
- Brian: [to Judith] They got what they deserved - the man of their dreams.
- Shirley Holmes: [to Bo] More like their nightmares.
- [Shirley is trying to locate Kemp's alter ego in a cyber-romance chat group]
- Shirley Holmes: Bo! The Man of Your Dreams - it's him!
- Francis Boris 'Bo' Sawchuk: Answer him.
- Shirley Holmes: What do I say?
- Francis Boris 'Bo' Sawchuk: I don't know. Flirt with him... Quickly! We're going to lose him.
- [Looking over Shirley shoulder, Bo reads her intended response off her computer screen]
- Francis Boris 'Bo' Sawchuk: "What do you think of recent quantum theories of singularity?" No! You can't send that!
- Shirley Holmes: We need help.
- [last lines]
- Shirley Holmes: Of all the mysteries I've investigated, love is the most perplexing. What makes rational people willingly relinquish their sanity? It beats me, but one thing's for sure - it's never going to happen to me.
- [Shirley smiles shyly at Bo when he gallantly holds the school door open for her]