NCIS (TV Series)
Corporal Punishment (2007)
Sean Murray: Timothy McGee
Quotes
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Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : [about Ziva hitting his abdomen] Do it.
Special Agent Timothy McGee : As hard as she can?
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : As hard as you can.
Special Agent Timothy McGee : You know that's how Houdini died.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Ziva, did you kill Houdini?
Officer Ziva David : It is possible. I do not remember all of their names.
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Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : All right, listen up people. Our fugitive has been on the run for 90 minutes.
Officer Ziva David : It has been three hours, Tony.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Average foot speed over uneven ground, barring injuries, is four miles per hour.
Officer Ziva David : He is not on foot. He's in a car.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : What I need from each and every one of you is a hard target search of every gas station, residence, warehouse, farm house, outhouse, hen house, and dog house in the area. Our fugitive has a name and it is...
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs : Corporal Damon Werth.
Special Agent Timothy McGee : The Tommy Lee Jones speech *every* time we have a fugitive, really?
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Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Wow.
Special Agent Timothy McGee : What? No funny movie reference?
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : It's not funny.
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Officer Ziva David : I felt overwhelmed temporarily, which does not often happen to me, when we were wrestling with Werth.
[Tony and McGee exchange looks]
Officer Ziva David : What? What is this look?
Special Agent Timothy McGee : Nothing.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : You like him.
Officer Ziva David : I thought he was powerful.
Special Agent Timothy McGee : You really like him.
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Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Who are you having feelings about? You just said you were having feelings.
Officer Ziva David : I said that I *have* feelings. Not that I'm *having* feelings.
Special Agent Timothy McGee : That is a pretty sophisticated grammatical differentiation.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Don't change the subject with your big words, McNerd.
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Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : [makes a lot of grunting noises] Ok, do it!
[winces in preparation]
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs : [entering the room] Escaped mental patient.
Special Agent Timothy McGee : That's exactly what I'm thinking.
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[Ziva stabs a can to open it for McGee whose shoulder was dislocated]
Officer Ziva David : Straw?
Special Agent Timothy McGee : No, I'm good. I got the one arm. Thank you.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Maybe it was you, McGee. The one armed man. Thought it was one of those vets we met at the Walter Reed Hospital.
Special Agent Timothy McGee : Wrong case, Tony.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Do we even have a case? We already got the guy. What are we doing? What did we miss? What's happening?
[Ziva looks confusedly at McGee]
Special Agent Timothy McGee : They gave him pain killers.
Officer Ziva David : Oh.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : My fingers are fing-ing.
[elevator dings]
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Special Agent Timothy McGee : [to Ziva about Werth] Itching for a rematch?
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Wanna roll around on the ground with him some more?
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Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : When you're dealing with someone on the run, you need to be able to climb inside his head. Think his thoughts. What would he do? Where would he go?
Special Agent Timothy McGee : Did a one armed man kill his wife?
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Would he dress up like a clown and join a traveling circus, like Jimmy Stewart in "The Greatest Show On Earth"?
Officer Ziva David : Do any of your ideas come from reality?
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Sure. Just not your reality.
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Abby Sciuto : These people have read way too many sci-fi comics.
Special Agent Timothy McGee : Some of these experiments are more fi than sci. One of them makes people glow in the dark.
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Officer Ziva David : I want to see him.
Navy Capt. Dr. Adrian De La Casa : [shakes his head] He's under heavy sedation. He's fine.
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs : She asked to see the patient.
Special Agent Timothy McGee : Probably not a good idea to stand in her way.
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Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Been working on my six pack, you know, abs.
Officer Ziva David : You and Abby have been drinking?
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : No, abdominals. No more beer gut for me. I've been training hardcore. Hitting the core hard. Carved. Hard as wood.
Special Agent Timothy McGee : To match your head.
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[Werth is going into cardiac arrest, De La Casa administers a shot of adrenaline]
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : [alarmed] They're pulling a Pulp Fiction...
Special Agent Timothy McGee : ...on the Hulk!