The Rite (2011)

Christopher Rodriguez Marquette: Eddie

Quotes 

• Eddie : Wait-wait-wait-wait, wait. S... seminary school, really? What, is this your way of tellin' me that you're gay?

  [Michael looks angrily at Eddie] 

  Eddie : I'm just joking. Okay? Joke.

  Michael Kovak : You don't get it. In my family, you're either a mortician or a priest. That's it.

  Eddie : Well, then change your name.

• Michael Kovak : Dude, I've looked into it. Four-year degree before you even take your first vows. If it doesn't work out, I can always leave.

  Eddie : Wow. Such faith.

• Nina : [gives Michael and Eddie two beers]  These are on the house.

  Eddie : Wow.

  Michael Kovak : You gonna get heat for giving away beers?

  Nina : Not if they don't know.

  Eddie : How about for banging the customers?

  Nina : Screw you, Eddie.

  [to Michael] 

  Nina : Drink up. I'm off in ten. Lickety-split.

  Eddie : Lickety-split? Pbb. You better make the most of that, before they chop your wiener off.

  [they cheer and clank bottles] 

  Eddie : Goodbye wiener.