Two and a Half Men (TV Series)

Fish in a Drawer (2008)

Jon Cryer: Alan Harper

Quotes 

• Alan Harper : [a hooker says, "Hi, Alan!". Evelyn burns him a look]  Hey, I'm not the one who's got a dead husband with lipstick on his dipstick.

• Jenna : So, are you a friend of the bride or the groom?

  Alan Harper : Well, the bride is my mother, so... the groom.