David Alan Grier: Various

Quotes 

• Various : [sketch portraying a sleazy TV informercial pitchman]  Hi. I'm Loomis Simmons. Ladies, do you long for the pitter patter of tiny little feets in your house? Are you worried that the kookoo bird in your biographical clock has stopped layin' eggs? I hope so. But you don't have to worry, when you let me KNOCK YOU UP!

  [spoken as the last three words appear on screen in capital letters]