United States of Tara (TV Series)

Pilot (2009)

John Corbett: Max Gregson

Quotes 

• Max : Is Mom here?

  Marshall : Yeah. I mean Mom's here... but, I'm just not sure of Mom's "here".

• Max : Buck, don't smoke in here.

  Tara : [as Buck]  I only smoke when I party.

  Max : This isn't a party.

  Tara : [as Buck]  Says you.

• Max : Wrap up those M.O.T.s - "muffins of triumph".

• Max : Looks like someone forgot their pants.

  Tara : i like to think of it as remembering my ass.

• Tara : [as teenage alter 'T', speaking to Max, as he walks in with a bucket of fried chicken]  Here comes Maxi pad now, with a bucket of fried dub.

  Max : 'T' you're back.

  Tara : F-n-ay!

• Tara : [as teenage alter 'T']  I'm a vegetarian now. I don't eat meat. Besides the hormones in that cluck cluck can make you get a third nipple.

  Max : Really?

  Tara : It's true guys. I got a myspace bulletin on it.

• Max : [Talking to his daughter about her mom]  You know a bad surprise is a trigger for her.

  Kate : Dad, everything is a trigger lately. I mean, why can't mom be manic depressive like all the other moms? You can't expect me to be the perfect child all the time, just because mom acts like a lot of different people when she's stressed.

• Max : [Flirting]  You look young and cheap.

  Tara : Thanks Max.