- Hoping for a night of wild abandon, Cook invites everybody to his birthday party at his uncle's pub but the party collapses after Effy's friend Pandora throws up. Cook manages to persuade everyone to gate-crash a party being thrown to celebrate the engagement of a girl called Kayleigh, but he falls foul of her father John White, a drugs baron to Madame Greta's brothel; he again encounters John White and a fight ensues and White threatens to kill Cook if he sees him again.—don @ minifie-1
- It starts with Cook (Jack O'Connell) getting ready for the day, putting his shirt on, doing his hair. He's then walking down the street with Freddie (Luke Pasqualino) and JJ (Ollie Barbieri) singing, the ace of spades. The shot shoes Freddie and JJ shaking their heads and Cooks' childlike behavior. Cook then starts skipping and playing air guitar as he sings. An old man passes by them and Cook starts bothering him. Freddie has to drag him off to get him to leave the man alone. Cook carries on walking and singing, Freddie is now getting annoyed. Cook holds him behind the neck and sings in his ear. Freddie tells him to calm down, Cook claims that he's just happy that it's his seventeenth birthday, as that's a milestone to him. JJ points out that eighteen it traditionally the milestone, but Cook just tells him to fuck tradition. Cook spots some 'posh' kids across the road that are staring at him, he starts shouting at them, and they tell him to 'fuck off back to playgroup'. At that Cook gets pissed and goes to run towards then, but Freddie and JJ stop him, and the guys run off. The guys go into a pub and meet Cooks Uncle Keith (Geoffrey Hughes), Cook and Keith have a chat, kidding around a little. He then introduces Keith to Freddie and JJ, Keith then doing the 'pull my finger' joke, then ordering them some drinks. Cook is listening to Keith tell a story from when he was younger, Cook asks him to tell a particular story but Keith has to go, but not before giving Cook his special present, a bag of drugs. Cook claims that Keith is a legend, but Freddie and JJ don't quite agree. At that point Katie (Megan Prescott), Emily (Kathryn Prescott), Pandora (Lisa Backwell) and Effy (Kaya Scodelario) arrive. Three guys enter the pub behind the girls, but Cook chases them off. Katie doesn't look to impressed by the pub, neither do most of them. Cook then goes a little bit mental pouring beer down himself. Which makes JJ laugh. Freddie, JJ, Effy, Katie, Emily, Panda and Cook are now all sitting round a couple of tables, singing for he's a golly good fellow to Cook, in very bored voices. Though Cook is enjoying it, jumping up and down. He then starts banging the table chanting 'more drinks'. He then gets up to get them. Katie makes a comment about Cook being 'fun', Freddie, knowing what he's like tells her that she has no idea, and JJ stating that he'd already had half a bottle of vodka. At that Effy asks a sarcastic 'really'. Cook then comes back with a tray full of tequila shots, and asks who wants them. Cook downs several, letting out a small bark after each one. When he's done Freddie, JJ and Cook all start howling like wolves, though Freddie only half-heartedly. JJ then does his birthday trick, he takes a pint of water, puts a cloth over it and when he takes it off, there's a goldfish in the glass. Cook then downs the water, fish and all, making Panda throw up. Cook stands over the sick and asks her if she's been drinking strawberry milkshakes. Cook asks the bar maid to clear it up and for some more tequila. Everyone besides Freddie and Effy have now left the table. The two are looking at each other. Naomi enters the pub. Katie's annoyed as she doesn't like her, because Emily told her that in school Naomi tried to kiss her. Naomi sits down next to Freddie, Cook gets up and leans over the table, he asks her if she wants to know a secret, he tells her that the cure if his cock. Not knowing what they were talking about before Naomi has no idea what he's going on about. Emily then gets out a cake she made for Cooks b'day. Cook then starts grabbing at the cake with his hands and eating it all to himself, making Effy laugh. He then washes the cake down with a pint. Cook says that he did it to get the party started, but then Katie kicks in telling him that it's not a party. The girls all then agree that the party id in fact 'shit'. There is lightening in the sky, Cook is outside leaning against the wall of the pub, praying for something to happen to make his party better. Freddie the comes out, talking to someone on the phone, he tells the person that he doesn't have any. Cook asks him who it is and he tells him that it's his sister. Trying to get her to hear that he doesn't have any drugs. Cook asks him why she couldn't hear him, Freddie tells him that she's at engagement party, for her friend. Cook then gets the idea into his head to go to the party, but Freddie doesn't want to go because he doesn't want to see his sister. The gang is now walking along a path on their way to the party Freddie's sister, Karen (Klariza Clayton), is at. Cook is at the front, singing yet again. They get to the entrance, and there is a bouncer there, Cook tries to walk past him but the bouncer stops him, saying that he's underage, not invited and he doesn't like the look of him, so he's not allowed in. Cook carries on trying to get in, but the bouncer isn't giving in, and so then Cook starts getting a bit mad, he starts shouting at the bouncer. Freddie has to pull him away telling him that if he carries on he'll get his face kicked in. At that moment, Freddie's sister Karen comes out, with the bride to be Kayleigh (Amy Ellen Burnett). She asks Freddie, what he's doing here, and says that he can't come in as it's a private party. She tells him that unless they have some drugs they can 'fuck off'. Cook then tries turning on the charm to get them all in. Karen tells him that it's not her decision as it's Kayleighs' party, so Cook then turns the charm onto Kayleigh. He asks her if she'll let them in, she says there is a pretty strict dress code, so Cook asks her how strict it is and pulls out the bag of drugs that his Uncle gave him earlier. They all walk inside, surprised by the atmosphere of the party. They thought it would be more of an 'acid filled sex rave' whereas the party is actually more 'jelly and ice cream'. Cook starts downing glasses of champagne, when a man spots him, the man it turns out, is Kayleighs' father, Johnny White (Mackenzie Crook), the gangster. He comes over to Cook, who surprised by Johnny, he tells Cook that nothing is too good for his daughter and to enjoy himself, though in a very strange way. Johnny then turns to his daughter, saying that he's proud of her and she's almost a woman now. As he walks off, Karen calls him a twat, and asks, rhetorically, if he knew. Katie notices everyone's expressions and as she has no idea who the man was she asks, they all explain who he is and tell her about some of the things he gets up to. The all go off the to find somewhere private to snort the drugs. Before Karen and Kayleigh, can get a hold of the drugs Panda swallows the entire packet, then saying that he mouth has gone numb. They start laughing at her, but Karen and Kayleigh are pissed. Kayleigh asks Cook if he'll get them some more, saying that it would be really great if he could, whilst giving him 'the look'. Back at the party, Effy is on the dance floor while Freddie watches her. Cook comes out saying that he needs to get more drugs, because Kayleigh gave him the look. Freddie, points out that he likes Effy, but Cook says that he's already slept with her, and so he wants something new. Freddie, is shocked as he didn't know that Cook had shagged her. When Freddie asks him about it, he tells Freddie that he slept with her the first day they met her. Freddie asks why he didn't tell him and JJ, to which Cook replies that unless his cock is up one of their asses, they have no reason to know where it is the rest of the time. Freddie the points out that JJ likes her, even though he does too and it's him that he's really talking about. JJ then starts getting upset, saying that he was going to ask her out, but Cook just says you snooze, you lose. Cook then walks off and JJ follows. As Effy is still dancing she looks over at Freddie, who is again watching her. Naomi is now walking out of the party, Emily comes out after her, asking her where she's going. Naomi replies that she's going home, and Emily asks her to stay. At that Naomi stops and turns to look at Emily, she asks her why she shouldn't go home. Emily says she doesn't know. Naomi changes the subject by asking Emily why her sister, Katie, thinks that Naomi is the one who is gay, and all Emily says is sorry, so Naomi just keeps on walking. Back inside, there are two men standing on a stage at the mic trying to get everyone's attention, they then introduce Johnny White onto the stage. He comes out and starts talking about her daughter and her fiancee, who turns out to be an enemy of Johnny, but the families are now getting along for the sake of the couple. Johnny gets his daughter up on stage and starts to congratulate her. Panda, who is a little iffy from the drugs and starts laughing. Johnny then proposes a a toast to his daughter. Outside Cook's Uncle shows up, to get him more drugs. Kayleigh and Cook go somewhere private for to get take them. As Cook thinks she wants to sleep with him he tries it on with her, but she just turns away. She tells him that if he wants to sleep with her, he'll have to impress her first. So when Cook goes back out into the party, he gets up onto the stage to sing. The guys watching him go up, are wondering what he's doing, Freddie starts getting worried thinking Cook is going to do something stupid. But all he goes is sing - pretty well and all. As he's singing he's putting on a pretty good show, certainly impressing Kayleigh, and everyone else. except Johnny, Cooks singing makes him pretty mad. Freddie and JJ see this and get worried, as Johnny starts walking toward Cook, Freddie, tries to stop him. Unfortunately, Johnny just gets madder and madder, and ends up hitting Cook over the head with a bottle, knocking him out. Cook wakes up in a room just off of the party, with Johnny standing over him. He grabs hold of Cook and decides that he's going to teach Cook a lesson. Then Freddie comes up to Johnny, sticking up for Cook, he tries to convince him to let Cook go. He succeeds, and tells his goons, to let Cook go, unfortunately, Cook ends up going backwards over the railings and landing on the table of food bellow, which covers Johnny's daughter and her fiancees family in the food. The guys family then starts insulting Johnny which again gets him mad and he then starts a fight. Cook gains consciousness again, and sits up on the stage, when he sees the guests now all fighting, he starts laughing. The gang - minus Emily and Naomi - are now running from the party as quickly as they can trying to get away, all of them laughing. When they get into an ally way, they finally stop running, all of the out of breath. They all start joking and laughing about what a great party it was. As Cook didn't get laid, he asks, Katie and Panda if they want to sleep with him, turning to Effy as a last resort once they say no. Freddie's now watching Effy intently, wanting to know whether she'll go or not. She turns him down and gets Panda home, Katie going along with them. Cook suggest going somewhere, as he still needs to get laid, but Freddie says he's tired and he's going home. Freddie says that he's tired of Cook, tired of looking after him all the time when he gets in trouble, so he goes home. Cook gets JJ to go along with him instead. Cook and JJ arrive at a brothel, JJ ever the innocent has no idea where they are though and is surprised when they get inside. Cook takes JJ into the back for the 'other service'. Where Cook has to settle for a hand job, and JJ doesn't want to do anything, so he just does kissing. Cook hears Johnny White in another room, and decides to get his revenge, so he grabs JJ and sneaks into Johnny's room. When they get in to the room, they find Johnny chained to a table, which Cook find hilarious. He takes a picture on his camera of Johnny, and when he starts talking back at him, Cook gets mad and threatens Johnny. Johnny says that he doesn't think Cook has the balls to send a picture of Johnny in his current state to everyone he knows, so Cook shows him by sending electric shocks through his body - which was a part of Johnny's kinky fantasy - after which Johnny makes a cooment about Cook's mother, which makes him really mad. He starts beating Johnny up, goign mental, and when JJ tries to stop Cook, he nearly punches JJ as well, which scares and shocks JJ. JJ runs off, and leaves Cook, who turns to Johnny calls him a bastard and after Johnny tells him that the next time he sees him, he'll kill him, he walks out. It's morning now, and Cook is by himself, walking to Freddie's. When he gets to Freddie's house, he gets round to his window and throws stones at his window trying to get him up. When Freddie does get up, he and agrees to see Cook in the shed as it's early and everyone is asleep at the moment. Cook sits in the shed and waits for Freddie to come in, when he does, Cook opens his beer and Freddie asks him if he's stopped drinking. Cook tells him that he's been up all night and offers Freddie the can, which Freddie refuses. Cook asks him what they were going to do today, but Freddie just asks him if he heard what he said the night before. Cook explains that something happened, that he wasn't him. He tells him that he did something stupid, and asks Freddie, to look after him. Freddie says that he won't because lately Cook has been going looking for trouble, killing himself to impress a nobody. Cook says that, that's the way it's always been, Cook, Freddie and JJ, best friend. Freddie agrees to be friends again, but that he won't let Cook take him down with him. Cook is walking down the street, and hears a noise like a gun firing, he ducks down thinking that it's Johnny coming after him, but it was just a motorcycle. When he realises this Cook starts laughing, and singing the ace of spades.
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