Corner Gas (TV Series)

TV Free Dog River (2009)

Lorne Cardinal: Davis Quinton

Quotes 

• Davis Quinton : [hosting a jazz radio program]  Hello, jazz fans. This is Downtown Davis. I'm gonna make a phone call, but it's not a real phone call. It's what we like to call a crank call. Okay, here we go.

  [he dials] 

  Brent Leroy : [answering]  Corner Gas.

  Davis Quinton : Hello.

  Brent Leroy : Hey, Davis.

  Davis Quinton : Oh, it's not Davis. This is John Coltrane, jazz saxophonist. Do you have any popsicles?

  Brent Leroy : Isn't John Coltrane dead?

  Davis Quinton : Yeah. That's why this is... Charlie Parker.

  Brent Leroy : He's dead too.

  Davis Quinton : Right. I mean... Ornette Coleman.

  Brent Leroy : You want to think this through and call me back?

• Davis Quinton : [speaking into radio mic]  It's 20 minutes after the hour, and Karen Pelly has just entered the police station. No accidents, so it should be smooth walking all the way to her desk.

  Karen Pelly : What are you doing?

  Davis Quinton : I got out the old ham radio and I was thinking - we could do a radio show to help people through No TV Week!

  Karen Pelly : Ah, that is so cool! This is gonna be great! A classic rock station right here in Dog River!

  Davis Quinton : [with sarcasm]  Yeah, 'cause that's what Saskatchewan needs is another classic rock station - maybe we could call it The Bear, or The Goat, or The Moose!

  Karen Pelly : That's good, I like all of those names.

  Davis Quinton : No... what Saskatchewan needs is an all-jazz station!

  Karen Pelly : But I thought we wanted people to listen - or am I confused?

• [Davis is jealous of how popular Karen's weather report is on their radio show] 

  Davis Quinton : Coming up next, we have Special K with her ever-popular weather report...

  Karen Pelly : Thanks Davis! Outside we...

  Davis Quinton : [imitating a helicopter's whirring]  But not before we hear from Big Daddy Davis with his traffic report! This is Davis with his eye in the sky. We're looking down on Main Street and it looks a little back-ack-a-dacked-up out there! We've got some cattle on the road...

  [cow mooing sound effect] 

  Davis Quinton : And a couple of lions as well...

  [lions roaring sound effect] 

  Davis Quinton : And a donkey!

  [donkey braying sound effect] 

  Davis Quinton : And now over to Special K for the weather!

  Karen Pelly : [aggressively]  Well, it is hotter out there than a...

  [cat meowing sound effect] 

  Karen Pelly : Ugh, I can't do this!

  Davis Quinton : Well, here is a weather report for you, Karen's attitude is as cold as ice! And speaking of "Cold as Ice", here's a little Foreigner for ya...

  [random tune playing] 

  Davis Quinton : Okay, that's not Foreigner... But if it was, it would have been pretty cool!