Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV Series)
PB&J (2021)
Andy Samberg: Jake Peralta
Photos
Quotes
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Doug Judy : [Rapping] Doug and Jake rolling down the street...
Jake Peralta : PB and J, a tasty little treat...
Doug Judy : Two cool dudes making sandals for your feet...
Jake Peralta : [Stops rapping] What?
Doug Judy : I was going for the rhyme, but now I kind of feel like it's a good idea.
Jake Peralta : Love it!
[Continues to rap]
Jake Peralta : Making sandals that last is our ideology / Made real by our patented, strapless technology
[Stops rapping]
Jake Peralta : It's magnets.
Doug Judy : Okay!
[Raps]
Doug Judy : Yo, you can wear 'em on the beach...
Jake Peralta : Wear 'em on a hike...
Doug Judy : Wear 'em on a Peloton exercise bike...
Doug Judy , Jake Peralta : Doug and Jake, two best friends / With the premium, open-toed shoes for men! Rah!
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Charles Boyle : Jake, by trusting him you're putting your job on the line, which means you're also putting my job on the line.
Jake Peralta : How so?
Charles Boyle : Because if you get fired, I will swim out into the ocean until I'm too tired to swim back and I will sink to the bottom and then I won't have a job.
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Trudy Judy : What's up, Peralta?
Jake Peralta : Hey, Trudy Judy and dog Judy. What's going on? Are you puppy sitting for Doug?
Trudy Judy : Well, I was, but I need you to take him for me, because I'm going on a little vacay, and let's just say there's going to be some activities that aren't suitable for a little dog.
[really sexy voice]
Trudy Judy : Mm!
[beat]
Trudy Judy : Like parasailing.
Amy Santiago : Oh. Thought you were building to something much more sexual.
Trudy Judy : Nope, just really pumped for parasailing. Also, there's gonna be a lot of --bleep--, but the dog's okay with that.
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Doug Judy : Jake Peralta, do I have an earring?
Jake Peralta : Um, what?
Doug Judy : You heard me. We've been in the car for three hours. You've known me for seven years. Do I have an earring?
Jake Peralta : Oh, no. I'm drawing a blank. I can kind of picture a diamond stud.
Doug Judy : That'd be a good look.
Jake Peralta : Or maybe a gold cross or a little hoop.
Doug Judy : I do have versatile ears.