- Hank Hill: A boy who has a unicorn ranch in his bedroom shouldn't call other people weird. That's right. We know about Rancho Unicorno.
- Bobby Hill: What's a meat examination team?
- Hank Hill: It's like a debate team, but instead of doing something useless, they compete by judging cut and quality of meat.
- Roger Stiles: What do you say, Bobby? You ready to take raw meat to the next level?
- Bobby Hill: Can I Dad? Can I join the team?
- Hank Hill: I have been waiting 13 years for you to ask that. Absolutely.
- Hank Hill: Why would you pass up the chance to compete at the state level, especially when that State is Texas?
- Bill Dauterive: There's no greater sign that a competition is legitimate than the chartering of a bus.
- Hank Hill: How was dinner? Did you eat lots of protein and say some prayers?
- Bobby Hill: We did neither, unless you consider eggs protein.
- Hank Hill: I do not.
- Peggy Hill: Who knows where this could take him?
- Kahn Souphanousinphone, Sr.: Oh yeah, real far. He'll be able to skip a semester at hamburger school.
- Bobby Hill: [running and sliding into the kitchen on his stomach] Pajama slide! Good purchase, mom!
- Hank Hill: [sighs] I haven't even finished breakfast and that boy ain't right.