It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (TV Series)
The Waitress Is Getting Married (2009)
Charlie Day: Charlie Kelly
Quotes
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Dennis Reynolds : Let's talk about your likes and dislikes. Um, how 'bout your favorite food, what would that be?
Charlie Kelly : Oh, milk steak.
Dennis Reynolds : Hm, what?
Charlie Kelly : Milk steak.
Dennis Reynolds : I'm not putting milk steak!
Mac : Just put steak, just put regular steak...
Dennis Reynolds : I'm gonna put steak.
Charlie Kelly : Don't put steak, put milk steak. She'll know what it is.
Dennis Reynolds : No, she won't know what it is, Charlie. Nobody knows what that is. Okay, alright, what's your favorite hobby?
Charlie Kelly : Uh, magnets.
Dennis Reynolds : Okay, wha- like making magnets, collecting magnets?
Mac : Playing with magnets?
Charlie Kelly : Just magnets.
Dennis Reynolds : I'm gonna put snowboarding. We'll put snowboarding. Alright, what are some of your likes?
Charlie Kelly : Uh, ghouls.
Mac : Son of a bitch. What are you talking about now?
Charlie Kelly : You know, funny little green ghouls.
Dennis Reynolds : What, like in movies? In cartoons?
Charlie Kelly : Little green ghouls, buddy!
Mac : Don't write ghouls!
Dennis Reynolds : I'm not, I'm putting travel! Jesus Christ! What are your dislikes?
Charlie Kelly : People's knees.
Dennis Reynolds : Oh, come on! Dude, come on! We'll make the whole thing up, let's get outta here. We're not even gonna use you.
Mac : Bro, you've gotta be kidding. You know what, we'll just make it all up.
Charlie Kelly : Cover your knees up if you're gonna be walking around everywhere...
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Charlie Kelly : I'm gonna want the milk steak, boiled over hard, and a side of your finest jelly beans, raw.
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Jackie : What is it that you do again?
Charlie Kelly : I'm like a janitor at- um, I'm a... full-on rapist, you know? Uh, Africans, dyslexics, children, that sorta thing.
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Charlie Kelly : I'll tell you what, let me pop a quick 'H' on the box.
[draws H on box]
Charlie Kelly : This way we'll all know it's full of hornets.
Dennis Reynolds : Do what you gotta do.
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Mac : How much cheese have you eaten today?
Charlie Kelly : How much cheese is too much cheese?
Dennis Reynolds : Any amount of cheese before a date is too much cheese!
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Charlie Kelly : But I am who I am.
Mac : Yeah, but let's pretend you're not like who you are and just try to attract a woman.
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Dennis Reynolds : As I tried to explain before, you cannot get honey from a hornet's nest.
Charlie Kelly : I just don't think there's any science to support that, buddy.
Dennis Reynolds : There's some very basic science out there supporting that.