30 Minutes or Less (2011)

Danny McBride: Dwayne

Photos 

Quotes 

• Nick : Now, give me the fucking code.

  Dwayne : Alright. 69-69-69.

  Nick : [pauses]  You gotta be fucking kidding me.

• Dwayne : What is the one thing this town is missing? I'll give you a hint. It's cash business and it's crawling with sexy bitches.

  Travis : Chinese food restaurant?

  Dwayne : No.

  Travis : Abortion clinic.

• [from trailer] 

  Dwayne : I liked the bear, I don't even fucking know you.

• [from trailer] 

  Dwayne : Sometimes fate pulls out its big ol' cock and slaps you right in face.

• Nick : I taught myself how to do this shit. Went online, looked all this up!

  Dwayne : Oh I hear ya. I taught myself how to eat pussy and cut my own hair!

• Dwayne : Fucking victory tacos!

• Dwayne : You're a cold son of a bitch, dad.

  The Major : That's what it takes, boy. In the Corps, pussies like you wore dresses to keep us entertained.

  Dwayne : That's really fuckin' disturbing.

• Dwayne : This is like the Marines. If you hesitate, if you fuck around, I will leave you behind.

• Dwayne : I've been thinking a lot about the 'polishing the scepter' deal. I know that's really not for polishing the scepter, you're just talking about sucking my dick. But I just want you to know that it's going to be mutual. You won't just have to polish my scepter, I will also lick your crown, which is a euphemism for eating your pussy. Ok, well give me a call when you get a chance. Goodbye.

• Dwayne : [watching Friday the 13th Part III]  I'm not afraid of Jason. Look at me. I'm fucking Jason. In his fucking mask hole.

• Dwayne : Sometimes faith pulls out its big ol' cock and slaps you right in the face.