- Serena van der Woodsen: [to Blair on what guy she might choose] I even made a list of pros and cons. Dan: Good shoulders to cry on. Nate: Good shoulders.
- Vanessa Abrams: Stop talking.
- Dan Humphrey: You know I'm not good at that.
- Vanessa Abrams: I think I can help.
- [they kiss]
- Serena van der Woodsen: It's like choosing between éclairs and napoleons. They're both delicious.
- Blair Waldorf: Except Humphrey's a doughnut.
- Serena van der Woodsen: [on cellphone] Oh, hi, Mom!
- Lily van der Woodsen: I'm sorry to be bothering you on your last day, Serena, but I just got a very upsetting phone call from the Paris police.
- Serena van der Woodsen: Oh, if it's about Blair pushing me into the fountain, I'm not pressing charges.
- Blair Waldorf: You should have told me you got shot.
- Chuck Bass: I'm surprised you didn't shoot me yourself.
- Blair Waldorf: I have. Many times, in my dreams. The good ones.
- Eva Coupeau: [after Blair rushed past her, wearing that flowing red gown] I knew it was too good to be true. Who is she?
- Blair Waldorf: [taking off her designer court shoe and hands it over to Louis, her version of Cinderella] This is a Vivier. It's a hell of a lot more expensive than a glass slipper.