Community (TV Series)

Asian Population Studies (2011)

Ken Jeong: Ben Chang

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jeff Winger : I wanna say some names to you. Jeffrey Dahmer. Ted Bundy. Rich. What do they have in common? We don't know them very well. What do we know about Ben Chang? We know he's nuts.

  Ben Chang : Let him finish.

  Jeff Winger : We know he's dangerous. Unpredictable. Selfish. We know he uses his name to make bad puns.

  Ben Chang : Guilty as Chang'd.

  Jeff Winger : When he talks, he over- and under-emphasizes words at random. When he eats, he holds his fork like a murderer's knife, gnawing at its skewered payload like a deranged woodland rodent.

  Ben Chang : Bring it home!

  Jeff Winger : He smells like Band-Aids. We know he dresses like a Cuban cab driver. We know he exhibits... Nay, flaunts, proudly, obvious symptoms of over half a dozen disorders you wouldn't wish on your worst enemy's pets.

  Ben Chang : Feel the heat.

  Jeff Winger : We know these things about Ben Chang. And so much more than we ever wanted to know about him. Why? Because it's there. It's on the surface. What you see may be what you don't want, but it's also what you get.

  [about Rich] 

  Jeff Winger : Who is this kettle corn popping phantom? This human question mark? This number eight scoop of vanilla tapioca with a PhD in Being Swell and a masters in Everybody Loves Me? Who is it? We may never know. I only know one thing. Nobody is this good a person. And nobody can get any worse than this. He's horrible. Now. Who's voting for Chang?

• Ben Chang : [from the top of a bookcase above the group]  "Chang" the subject.

  Troy Barnes , Jeff Winger , Annie Edison , Abed Nadir , Pierce Hawthorne , Shirley Bennett , Britta Perry : [shocked]  Aah!

  Troy Barnes : [loudly]  What are you doing up there?

  Ben Chang : It's the beginning of a new semester of anthropology and I'm here to get what I was promised.

  Jeff Winger : Sure. Who her has Chang's pile of nothing?

  Ben Chang : You know what I mean. I'm sick of the run-around. I'm here to demand an immediate answer about whether I'm joining the study group.

  Jeff Winger : Well, if we have to give an immediate answer, it would have to be no.

  Ben Chang : Take your time. Sleep on it. Then get back to me, or else.

  Annie Edison : Jeff, you did say we would let him in eventually.

  Jeff Winger : That was before he started using his name as a pun. It makes me so Changry.

  [Annie gasps] 

  Jeff Winger : Oh, God, it's happening to me.

  Troy Barnes : Let's get back to who Annie's in love with. Is it Fat Neil?

  Abed Nadir : Bluestreak?

  Pierce Hawthorne : Pierce: Optimus Prime?

  Annie Edison : Ok, even I know some of these are Transformers.

  Jeff Winger : [irritatedly]  Who cares who it is? Let's just study.

  Abed Nadir : Study what? We haven't had our first class yet.

  Jeff Winger : [insistently]  Well, can we talk about something other than Annie's love life?

  Shirley Bennett : [smiles and nods her head]  We could talk about my love life.

  Jeff Winger : Is it Jean Claude Van Overbite?

  [Annie rolls her eyes] 

  Abed Nadir : We should really start learning people's names.

  Jeff Winger : I agree with brown Jamie Lee Curtis.

  [Abed mimics gunshot at Jeff in agreement] 

• Jeff Winger : What do we know about Ben Chang? We know he's nuts.

  Ben Chang : [interrupts]  Let him finish!

  Jeff Winger : We know he's dangerous. Unpredictable. Selfish. We know he uses his name to make bad puns.

  Ben Chang : Guilty as Chang'd.

  Jeff Winger : When he talks, he over- and under-emphasizes words seemingly at random. When he eats, he holds his fork like a murderer's knife, gnawing at its skewered payload like a deranged woodland rodent.

  Ben Chang : Bring it home!

  Jeff Winger : We know he smells like Band-Aids. We know he dresses like a Cuban cab driver. We know he exhibits... nay, flaunts, proudly, obvious symptoms of over half a dozen disorders you wouldn't wish on your worst enemy's pets.

  Ben Chang : [sing-songy]  Feel the heat!

  Jeff Winger : We know these things about Ben Chang and so much more than we ever wanted to know about him. Why? Because it's there. It's on the surface. What you see may be what you don't want, but it's also what you get.

  Andre Bennett : [underwhelmed]  Wow.

• Ben Chang : Unless you want a front row seat to Annie loves Richie, it's time to "Chang" your point of view.

  Jeff Winger : It's not even clever. You keep using it as the word "change." Okay. Okay. Okay. Just do me a favor. Let me do all the talking and follow my lead.

  Ben Chang : Deal.

  [slow claps] 

  Jeff Winger : Seriously, do you have brain damage?

• Ben Chang : What is this? What's going on?

  Abed Nadir : It's a mixer.

  Ben Chang : Why is everyone from anthro class here? Are you guys picking a new study group member? And you didn't invite me?

  Abed Nadir : We didn't know how to reach you.

  Ben Chang : What are you talking about? I'm everywhere.

  Abed Nadir : We didn't know how to reach you.

  Ben Chang : That's not true. That's a lie.

  Abed Nadir : It's a mixer. We didn't know how to reach you.

  [Abed begins blinking his eyes and robotically jerking his head to his left] 

  Abed Nadir : It's a mixer. It's a mixer. It's a mixer. It's a mixer.

  [Chang quickly walks away] 

  Abed Nadir : Works every time.