Law & Order: Special Victims Unit (TV Series)

Smoked (2011)

Christopher Meloni: Detective Elliot Stabler

Quotes 

• Salon Client : [after Luke Ronson is arrested]  When can I reschedule?

  Elliot Stabler : About 25 years.

• Elliot Stabler : Not looking forward to telling Jenna that her mom's killer is in the wind. Just feels as though we keep failing her.

  Olivia Benson : Look, it's not over till it's over. Besides, Eddie doesn't seem like the kind of guy who can stay underground. He needs attention, somebody to brag to.

  Elliot Stabler : Well, when we find him again and I accidentally run him over?

  Olivia Benson : I'll have your back.

• Eddie Skinner : [to Stabler]  Hey, let me ask you something, is it fun being a cop?

  Elliot Stabler : Fun? I love it.

  Eddie Skinner : Yeah, see, I thought so. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a cop when I grew up.

  Elliot Stabler : The problem there is you gotta care about people and the only person you give a crap about is yourself.

• Sister Peg : Luke's been a godsend.

  Elliot Stabler : He's also a rapist, Sister Peg.

  Sister Peg : Accused, not convicted.

  Elliot Stabler : Come on, Sister.

  Sister Peg : Congress cut my funding. I have to take all the help I can get.

• Special Agent Greer : The NYPD doesn't have informants?

  Elliot Stabler : Hey, WE don't hand over handguns with body counts on them and hope for the best. I don't know if you noticed but we've got a real handgun problem in this country, too many of them wind up in the hands of bad guys, and obviously they've been getting 'em from jackasses like you.