- Dr. Doofenshmirtz: So what am I gonna do with the Least-Likely-inator, you ask? Make my daughter obey me? Make my father love me? No! And double no! - well, maybe later - but first I'm gonna aim this bad boy at City Hall and zap by brother, the mayor, and he'll make a fool of himself in front of the legislature, which is the least likely thing he'd ever do. And the city will be forced to give the Tri-State area to me, his next of kin! - and don't tell me democracy doesn't work like that, Perry the Platypus! I don't want to hear it.
- Major Monogram: Oh... the Marsh Maneuver! I haven't seen one of those since 1974!
- Carl: '74? You had a perm back then.
- Major Monogram: STAY OFF THE INTERNET, CARL!
- Supercomputer: [scanning the Danville] Gathering data from all objects and inhabitants.
- Phineas: Well, you seem to be working perfectly, so... Computer, what is the nicest thing we can do for Mom today.
- Supercomputer: Computing. Done. Get a gallon of industrial marking dye and a leaf blower, tie balloons onto them, then go to the top of Danville Hill and, at 2:37 P.M., release them into the wind.
- Phineas: Really?
- Supercomputer: Nothing could make your mother happier today.
- Baljeet: You turned down "slide rule" for THIS?
- Phineas: I don't know, Baljeet. From what we've seen so far, I think a little blind faith is called for.
- Phineas: You guys just delivered to the zoo?
- Delivery Man: Well, yes. Yes we did, but...
- Phineas: I THOUGHT I detected a hint of western lowland gorilla.
- Delivery Man: No. No, that's me.
- Phineas: Oh. Sorry, dude.
- Delivery Man: That's okay. I'm learning to live with it.
- Phineas: [to Ferb] Yeech! I could learn a thing or two from you about talking less.
- Phineas: Now, let's see... The Hall of Mirrors obviously goes in the hall, but where should we put the liquid nitrogen room.
- Dr. Doofenshmirtz: Oh, I see what you're doing. You're messing with my head, trying to get into my mind, walk around in there, rearrange the furniture, maybe re-paint the kitchen.
- Dr. Doofenshmirtz: Okay, Perry the Platypus, the claws are off now! From here on in, I fight man-style!