- Kurt Hummel: It isn't going to be easy. There are going to be days where life just sucks, but you're going to get through this cause I'm going to help you and so is everyone who loves you and accepts you for who you are.
- Kurt Hummel: I'm really happy that you're alive, David.
- Dave Karofsky: Me, too.
- Kurt Hummel: I should have returned your calls.
- Dave Karofsky: Why would you, after the way I've treated you?
- Kurt Hummel: It's okay.
- Dave Karofsky: No, it's not okay. It's like you said on Valentine's Day, I made your life a living hell for months, but when the same thing happened to me, I couldn't even take it for a week. I suppose a best friend telling me he never wants to talk to me again, my mom telling me that I have a disease and maybe I can be cured. I don't know what to do. I can't go back to that school.
- Kurt Hummel: Then go to another school. I'm not gonna lie to you, it it isn't gonna be easy. And there'll be some days when life just sucks, but you're gonna get through this 'cause I'm gonna help you. And so is everyone else who loves you and accepts you for who you are. And if they can't accept that, then screw 'em, right?
- Dave Karofsky: Yeah.
- Kurt Hummel: [to Sebastian] I'm sorry I didn't hear you. I was distracted by your giant horse teeth.
- Sebastian Smythe: [to Rachel and Kurt] Well, well, well. If it isn't a young Barbra Streisand and an old Betty White. Where is Gay Cyclops? Still trying to stumble his way in?
- Kurt Hummel: [to Sebastian] You give a bad name to the entire gay community.
- Sebastian Smythe: And you give the gay community cutting-edge fashion that's usually only seen on Puerto Rican pride floats.
- Quinn Fabray: [after Karofsky attempts suicide] I feel sorry for Karofsky, but what he did was selfish. He didn't just want to hurt himself. He wanted to hurt everyone around him. I went through the wringer, but I never got to that place.
- Kurt Hummel: Quinn, please. Sure, you had a baby when you were 16 and you had a bad dye job for two weeks, but seriously? The world never stopped loving you and you're going to Yale. You have no idea what Karofsky was struggling with.
- Quinn Fabray: You really want to try to compare...
- Kurt Hummel: The despair, the self-loathing. It doesn't matter.
- Quinn Fabray: I just can't imagine things getting so messed up that you would consider taking your own life.
- Kurt Hummel: That is so harsh and reductive. Have some compassion.
- Santana Lopez: [to Sebastian] Let me break it down for you from one bitch to another. All this vicious, underhanded crap has got to stop.
- Sam Evans: Someday, I want to earn enough money to buy my folks a new place so they don't ever have to go through losing their home again.
- Noah 'Puck' Puckerman: I'm sort of embarrassed to admit it, but I really do want to graduate high school.
- Finn Hudson: I'm gonna petition the Army to change my dad's dishonorable discharge status to an honorable one.
- Rory Flanagan: I know this sounds silly, and the peanut butter really is amazing, Mr. Shue, but do you know what I'm looking forward to? Winning at Regionals.
- Rachel Berry: [after Sebastian gives Rachel a photo of a nude Finn] Oh, my God!
- [covers up Finn's privates in the picture]
- Rachel Berry: That thing is photoshopped! His thing is not that small or brown!
- Kurt Hummel: And he could never fit into those pumps.
- Sebastian Smythe: Just think, from now until eternity, every time someone Googles Finn Hudson, they'll be treated to that and dozens just like it. That's the beauty of the Internet. It stays with us forever.
- Rachel Berry: What do you want, Sebastian?
- Sebastian Smythe: I want a guaranteed Regionals win, so I want you to drop out. McKinley gets home-court advantage this year. You're going to come down with Asian bird flu or whatever Tina Blowing-Wang just had.
- Rachel Berry: But that is show choir terrorism.
- Sue Sylvester: [to Quinn] I, Sue Sylvester am with child.
- Quinn Fabray: Are you serious? Wow. Um, that's amazing and confusing. Who's the father?
- Sue Sylvester: Oh, I can't tell you that yet. But here's the deal. In order for this zygote to stay firmly ensconced in my uterine wall, my doctor has put me on bovine hormones that are making me extremely nauseous. They've also given me a near-superhuman sense of smell. For instance, I can tell that within the last week, you either enjoyed a delicious curry or a hug from Principal Figgins.
- Quinn Fabray: I wanted to ask you a favor, actually, Coach. I would love to rejoin the Cheerios.
- Sue Sylvester: I beg your pardon?
- Quinn Fabray: It's my senior year and I want to finish high school in a Cheerios uniform with a national championship. I mean, other than Glee, this was the rest of my high school experience.
- Sue Sylvester: Well, I'm sorry, Q, but that wouldn't be fair to the girls who've been practicing all year long who didn't quit. And if you'll now please get the hell out of my office. I just caught a whiff of hot dog water wafting in from the cafeteria, and I think I'm going to blow some serious chunks.