- Rachel Berry: If you like, you can make a list for me also.
- Finn Hudson: I like what the song says: "All I Want for Christmas is You".
- Rachel Berry: Oh, all I want for Christmas is you, too. And five things on that list.
- Finn Hudson: [after Rachel leaves] Holy crap, I'm dating Kim Kardashian!
- Rory Flanagan: So, guys, my mama was gonna come visit me for the holidays, but plane tickets are expensive, so this is my first Christmas without my family. I'd like to cheer myself up. I'm dedicating this song to them. And to the King.
- Kurt Hummel: Jesus?
- Artie Abrams: Some say Judy was high on pills and booze, but I say she was high on excitement and baby Jesus.
- Sue Sylvester: Wheels, Porcelain, Other Gay. The yuletide season is upon us and everyone knows that Christmas is a time for forgiveness. So I have decided to forgive you for having no talent and ruining the American songbook one mash-up at a time.
- Rory Flanagan: Sam, I was wondering if you'd like to be my Valentine's Day sponsor as well. I mean, you did such a good job being a Christmas sponsor, I figured you'd have no problem helping me land a snog or two by February.
- Sam Evans: Deal, but you have to help me learn to perfect my Sean Connery. I'm telling you, impressions are the best way to get a chick.