- Ted Mosby: [Lily and Marshall arrive at Ted's apartment and see it empty. Lily sees note] Dear Lily and Marshall, I don't know if you know this, but I never took your names off the lease. Well, today, I took my name off it. The apartment... is now yours and I think I've found what to do with Robin's old room
- [They walk in to Robin's old room and find that it is painted blue and has been turned in to a baby room]
- Ted Mosby: . You see, for me, this place had begun to feel haunted. At first I thought it was haunted by Robin, but I now think it was haunted by me. Well, no ghost is at peace until it finally moves on. I need a change, and I think you do too. This apartment needs some new life, so please, make our old home your new home. It is now ghost-free. Love, Ted.
- Ted Mosby: It's not a date, it's you going to a strip club paying for lap dances!
- Barney Stinson: If it's not a date, why'd she say that every fifth dance is free?
- Ted Mosby: Because that's the Lusty Leopard's policy on Friday nights, and I'm so mad at you that I know that!
- Barney Stinson: [Having spent some good time with Karma, Barney has just discovered that she is using the same routine on everybody else] Did I deserve this? Absolutely. I've told some outrageous lies. I have told women that I was famous, a war hero, that sex with me would cure their nearsightedness...
- Robin Scherbatsky: [Ted is smoking meat in Robin's old room. Robin's ghost appears] What are you doing in my old room?
- Ted Mosby: This room being empty was bumming me out, so I decided to do something healthy that would take my mind off you.
- Robin Scherbatsky: Well, nothing says healthy like smoking 40 pounds of pork loin in an unventilated room while having an imaginary conversation with your ex.
- Ted Mosby: Just for that, you're not getting any.
- Robin Scherbatsky: I'm not getting any? You're the one smoking your own meat. Oh!
- Robin Scherbatsky: [Ted is doing carpentry in Robin's old room. Robin's ghost appears] So Ted, what healthy, not-at-all-crazy activity are you up to now?
- Ted Mosby: I liked smoking meat, but now I've got a new passion: wood.
- Robin Scherbatsky: You hear these things that come out of your mouth, right?
- Ted Mosby: Maybe it's destiny?
- Barney Stinson: Nah, Destiny strips at the Melon Patch. They're people Ted, try to keep 'em straight.
- Barney Stinson: What am I going to do about this Quinn thing? I want to ask her out again but I don't know how I feel about her being a stripper.
- Ted Mosby: Why would you have an issue with that? You've dated convicted felons, arms dealers... pageant moms?
- Robin Scherbatsky: [Ted talks to Robin's ghost] Why don't you just turn this into a guest room?
- Ted Mosby: A guest room? You mean a room ready and waiting for someone who isn't there? A room devoted to reminding me that I'm still alone? Yeah, I don't need that.
- Robin Scherbatsky: Ted, no matter how many things you put in this room... I'll still be here.
- [Robin disappears]