- Andy Dwyer: Oowee! I can't believe we're at Hogwarts!
- Ben Wyatt: No, that's Buckingham Palace. Hogwarts is fictional. Do you know that? It's important to me that you know that.
- Ron Swanson: [Standing in front of Big Ben] Look. A clock. We don't have that in America.
- Ron Swanson: [Standing in front of the Tower of London] You call that a tower? Try the Sears Tower, friend.
- Jean-Ralphio: When life gives you lemons, you sell some of your grandma's jewelry and you go clubbin'.
- Andy Dwyer: [Distracted] Are those remote control helicopters?
- Lord Edgar Covington: Yeah. I got them as a gift. I bought them for one of my nephews, and then I decided to keep them. Would you like to play with them?
- Andy Dwyer: Oh, would I? I call blue one!
- Lord Edgar Covington: I call the... oh. Okay, you get the blue one.
- Ben Wyatt: Andy, we are guests of Lord Covington. Maybe you should let him play with the blue helicopter.
- Andy Dwyer: What are you talking about, dude? I called it.
- Lord Edgar Covington: He called it.
- Andy Dwyer: That's the rule.
- Lord Edgar Covington: That's the rule.
- Ben Wyatt: Lord Covington, I'm Ben Wyatt. This is Andy Dwyer, and it is an honor to meet you, sir.
- Lord Edgar Covington: Well, it's nice to meet you too. However, the proper mode of address would be "Your Royal Excellency, Lord Edgar Darby Covington, 14th Earl of Cornwall-upon-Thames, 29th Baron of Hertfordshire. "
- [Awkward pause]
- Lord Edgar Covington: No, no, no, I'm kidding. I'm kidding.
- Andy Dwyer, Ben Wyatt: Oh!
- Lord Edgar Covington: Please, call me Eddie.
- Ben Wyatt: Oh, thank God.
- Andy Dwyer: I knew that other name must have been a stupid joke.
- Ben Wyatt: Andy...
- Lord Edgar Covington: No, no, no, no, he's absolutely right, it's an absurd name.