John Apple Jack (2013) Poster

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Great idea, poorly executed
jaroslaw996 May 2015
(I'm going to say this review contains mild Spoilers but little not already mentioned or strongly alluded to in the opening description)This movie had such potential but ultimately made little sense. Even the brief description is wrong. John (the playboy) was JACK's boyhood crush not vice versa. The characters were wildly inconsistent at times, at least in part, to be humorous. But mostly it is just annoying and didn't make sense. For example, the father fires John from the family company, cuts him out of everything completely and but by movie's end all is well. They never showed how this transition came about. It was never explained why Jack had a crush on John for TWENTY years. Or whether he had any boyfriends in the meantime or why he would wait so long. Why did John fall madly in love with Jack after almost ignoring him 20 years? No answers in this film. Most unfortunate - why did they cast the gorgeous hunk "Paul" only to give him such a small part? Would have loved to see him in a Speedo swimsuit.
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1/10
So, so, sooo bad
allegronontroppo24 June 2018
I hardly ever write reviews on movies but this takes the cake. It's hard to come across very good gay independent movies in general. I couldn't take my eyes off this train wreck of a movie. Between the acting and horrible dialogue, I found myself talking aloud at the atrocity. Who comes up with this crap!?
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2/10
Worst thing that has ever happened to Chinese after Nanjing Massacre
lukelin29 November 2016
This is just plane horrible. It completely fetishises Asians on so many different levels. So the Asian mother just has to have a ridiculous accent? The Asian boy toy of course just has to be so feminine and slutty. Chinese guys just have to be sexually repressed and only has responsibility in their life and finally, it is another white guy's opportunity to be the savior.Asian gay men, just like Asian women become this projection of stereotypical infatuated loyal husband that loves the white guy for 20 years, and whatever stupid thing the white guy has done the Asian guy will just always take him back. All the talk about Chinese food is just infuriating, the western-centric assumption of "westernizing Chinese food". This movie is practically a hate crime against Chinese.Why is this even legal on the market.
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1/10
Nothing redeeming
Coralknight1 June 2018
What do you get when you mix horrible acting, bad editing, even worse writing and a wafer thin premise with minstrel-show style racist caricatures? The answer is something along the lines of "a horrible travesty of an abomination which should be avoided at all costs. Seriously; stare into the sun for 4 hours and clean your ears out with a power-drill before you are ever forced to sit through this insanely distasteful tribute to bad cinema. There is absolutely no reason anyone should or would want to watch this.
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7/10
Kidding me? this film is awesome!!!
tranngocthanhtu13 October 2020
Warning: Spoilers
I love this, this is my own taste, and I have to admit that I have a low-taste, but come on, this film don't deserved all that hateful reviews, it really not that bad. First - it has a handsome cast with not too bad acting (I'd seen really bad acting films, and it worse more than this), second - it has a story, and it attracted me, I really like this kind of love and obsession things. Many people don't understand why Jack love John for 20 years, and then why John suddenly love him back, but I do, I get it. There loves in life you'll never forget, it like a fire always burn slowly in Jack and John heart, you can easily see that John and Jack fancy each other since childhood, but John so affair of everything (that why he push Jack, and then never come out to his family until that dinner) and Jack is too scare and shy, because John ignore and cold to him, so Jack just fool himself that John have feelings for him but don't show it, that why he just keep thinking about John for 20 years later, first love that something you'll never forget right? but Jack can't sure if John really have feelings for him, that just his obsession... so that how the story go and how it make me so happy to see they end up together. This film like a fairy tail, it really have a wake-up kiss like "Sleeping Beauty" and I love it, it so sweet... and then they live happy ever after :)))). The dialogues are good, it means, something that many others film had said, but in this film it still touch me, that after all "All you need is love", that when Jack said that he doesn't want to fight back, he need love back, you can see how much he want this relationship, that he need John in his life so much but at that times he so hopeless, because he feel so unsure, because it twenty years between them and John still in a role of a bad-boy, because "you can't be a fool all the time", beside, he has his dream, that he been trying to gain it as hard as he can, he has responsibility for his son too, that make he a hard choice, but thankfully, all the character in this film just such good people (maybe too good to be true) and just want Jack and John to be happy, but it a film anyway, a little dreamy can be accepted. Finally - all about the bad things about China culture or people or accent or bla bla... i don't care about it just until someone speak it out, this film just totally a love story from start till end for me, some character like "Marco" just appear in many gay films, and what the matter if he is "Chinese" make it a offense??? this film not nominated for an Oscar anyway, so don't be too hard for it, it's a good film help me out for a tough day, so I love it!!!
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1/10
Silly drivel
smooth_op_8520 June 2020
This thing is convoluted so save your neurons, have this on as background music. Chinese and Asian stereotypes abound like the plague and I had to cut it off at the halfway mark. I don't like any of the characters I'm supposed to like and all I want is for the end to be all the characters, except the one kid to be hit by a fireball at the end so I can break out the Sahlen's hot dogs and revel as their sweet cries of agony rise from the fire

Save your time and energy., watch something else
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1/10
Amateurish production
qui_j20 July 2019
This movie is at the level of an amateur production that must have been extremely low budget. The acting is horrible beyond belief as all the "actors" seem to be real amateurs who probably thought they were making a video for social media. What I cannot understand is how this even made it to mainstream media! It's really, really bad!
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10/10
Romantic Rom-Com
splashpont15 September 2018
Is it a coincidence that this fun romantic comedy in the Hallmark tradition comes from Canada? (Perhaps it's actually a bit more Lifetime!) When the past is rekindled, the workplace and the family all play a part in getting us to that happy ending.

Mr. Leung's nominated role has led to his continued success at home and abroad.
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2/10
Poorly written & poorly acted tragic waste of time
kebliss5 April 2020
The best thing about this movie is the trailer, which promised a light, silly, and cute gay comic romp. It is actually a tragedy, a trite & tedious concept that plods so insipidity that it is a tragic waste of the viewer's time. Nice camera work & pleasant soundtrack, though.
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1/10
Wtf did I just PARTIALLY watch?
rbmiddleton19793 July 2022
I'm going to be completely honest... I'm a black man and I thank GOD there weren't any black men in this movie (at least the first 30 mins I could stomach). The stereotypes, fetishization, and racism towards the Asians was ridiculous! Like my face was seriously frowned up and I cringed so much from the acting! Nothing made sense and there was no plot! No point and no purpose. Like... Everyone else summed it up so I'm not going to spend time on this. If I can give lower than a 0 on this I would. Like they would have to owe me in order to watch this garbage dump of a movie. Smh... Just have someone run over your foot with a car. It'll be way better than sitting through this mess.
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1/10
About as BAD as it gets...
JJ-Chi12 February 2021
Superficial and predicable. Insults your intelligence and offends you with racial stereotypes. Zero humor nor an ounce of genuine human emotion.

Watching this was painful. You see better scripts and actors in a kindergarten play!
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Sexy Factor
diva300019 November 2017
The actors are sexy, especially Chris, but he doesn't look at all like he does in the movie. He has much longer hair in real life and a hairy chest that was bare in the movie. Curious as to why they shaved it.

His personality was sexy in the movie, don't know about his real life personality.
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