- Talking Elmo doll: Can Elmo smell your genitals?
- Eric Cartman: You guys wanna play outside or something?
- Kyle: Cartman? Your side won, dude. Why are you so sad?
- Eric Cartman: I just... I can't get that image of Bill Gates bashing that guy's head apart out of my eyes.
- Stan: Yeah, I know what you mean. Well, look guys: Xbox won the console wars. What are we gonna do? Not play video games?
- Eric Cartman: The last few weeks we've been too busy to play video games and look at what we did. There's been drama, action, romance. I mean, honestly you guys - do we need video games to play?
- Butters Stotch: Yeah.
- Jimmy: That's right.
- Butters Stotch: That's right.
- [at the same time as Jimmy]
- Jimmy: Yeah, you kind of make a point.
- Eric Cartman: Maybe we started to rely on Microsoft and Sony so much that we forgot that all we need to play are the simplest things! Like... like this!
- [picks up a broken wooden stick]
- Eric Cartman: We can play with this! Screw video games, dude; who fucking needs them?
- [everybody shouts, "YEAH!"]
- Eric Cartman: Fuck 'em!
- [holds the stick up to the sun]
- Commercial announcer: The South Park video game. Coming to stores soon!
- [an image of the years-in-development real life game, South Park: The Stick of Truth, appears on screen]
- Butters Stotch: Yeah, and if you believe that, I got a big floppy wiener to dangle in your face.
- [appearing in the lower left-hand corner of the screen]
- [George R. R. Martin and Butters are riding on horses on a highway with Scott Malkinson passed out on the horse Butters is riding]
- Butters: Just hold on a minute! Now I am pretty darn sure that the fastest way back to Colorado isn't on horseback.
- George R. R. Martin: That may be true, but horses have one quality that is unmatched by any other mode of transportation.
- Butters: What's that?
- [Butters looks down and sees the horse's large weiner]
- Butters: Ahhhhhhhhhhh!
- Eric Cartman: Did you see Prometheus? I don't even think the writers knew what that was about.
- Stan Marsh: Xbox people don't care about the truth. They just care about seamless multimedia connectivity.