Silicon Valley (TV Series)

Articles of Incorporation (2014)

Zach Woods: Donald 'Jared' Dunn

Photos 

Quotes 

• Richard : We love the name Pied Piper. It's a classic fairy tale.

  Jared : Well, I looked it up. It's about a predatory flautist who murders children in a cave.

  Gilfoyle : It has all that going for it, Richard, and I still hate it.

• Dinesh : Hey, Jared, you know who else is Canadian? Justin Bieber, the Hitler of music.

  Gilfoyle : Do you have a problem with me being Canadian?

  Dinesh : I do, actually. Do you have any idea how long it took me to become a citizen?

  Gilfoyle : Did it take you a long time? I'm glad I didn't do it then.

  Dinesh : Typical lazy immigrant. These people think they can just walk into this country

  Gilfoyle : did just walk into this country. My car broke down on the ambassador bridge. It took me an extra 15 minutes to get across the border. Major hassle.

  Jared : ...You know, Hitler actually played the bassoon. So, technically, Hitler was the Hitler of music.

• Jared : Richard, if we are going to change the name, we need to do it now. Names stick. My name's only Jared because Gavin called me that on my first day. My real name is Donald.

• Jared : [Trying to come up with a new company name]  All right, what about Smaller, spelled "S-M-L-L-R"? You know, because we make things smaller, and this would be like a smaller version of the word "smaller".

  Gilfoyle : It looks like "Smeller".

  Jared : Ok. What if we spell it "S-M-L-R"? Because that's an even smaller version of the word smaller.

  Dinesh : Then it looks like "Smiler".

  Gilfoyle : We're not gonna kick the shit out of "Nucleus" with "Smiler.

  Erlich Bachman : Where's Richard? Why isn't he in here for this?

  Dinesh : I think he was out back, wishing he'd taken the ten million dollars.

  Gilfoyle : No, I just saw him in his room, wishing he had taken the ten million dollars.