Mr D's No Thing Tales (2015) User Reviews

You Might Go to Jail After Watching This

[moviesandcandy · 1/10 · 20 September 2015]

Me D's No Thing Tales

Mr D, short for Dead, introduces a series of extreme horror tales, that are less about story telling and more about shock and gore. A horror anthology not for the faint of heart. If you want 2015 sleaze then look no further. This movie is one of the grimiest, skeeziest and trashiest films I've seen this year. Plus this movie looks like it was made by the 8th grade AV club nerds. Like the turds that work at that rag TMZ. Maybe it was made by Max the blonde surfer dude or the new Australian Max. It took me half a bottle of Francis Ford Coppola Merlot to make it through the whole craptacular feature. The graphics are the worst of all time along with the special effects so at least Mr. D's consistent. The girl getting raped and beaten by a ghost is unforgettable. This is an hour and a half of tying up and torturing topless skanks. In all seriousness every woman in Mr. D's schlockfest are absolutely stunning. How the director Jack Foster pulled it off I will never know. This Cleveland steamer was shot with a measly $10,000 budget. I would kill a bitch to find out what Amazon Prime paid the distributor to showcase this gem. This one actress gets a headache in the third act and you will to if you make it that far. Good luck and may the horrible movie Gods bless you in your quest to find something worse.

I can't believe someone made this movie

[ptbyrdie · 2/10 · 5 February 2024]

Mr D's No Thing Tales is described as a horror anthology. This is misleading This movie is a series of scenes of naked and semi-naked women being terrorised and tortured. We're it outright pornography, it would probably be banned for sexualising violence against women. And yet it clearly is meant to be titillating, otherwise why would every 'horror' story contain female nudity? Frankly, I'm stunned that anyone had the gall to make a movie containing stories such as these.

But not as stunned as I am that someone had the courage to release a movie containing such inadequate VFX as are displayed in here. Mr D himself is as egregious a piece of CGI as you'll ever see, surrounded by CGI female torture victims who are equally unconvincing. CGI blood is especially distracting. I understand that the movie was probably made on a shoestring, but how much does a few bottles of ketchup cost? This is particularly noticeable as some of the 'stories' in this anthology are purely CGI.

This is almost as bad a movie as I've watched. Yet I did watch it. I've stopped watching many more competently made, higher budget movies after twenty minutes or so. There's a fascination with what schlock and bad taste they'll try to get away with next. And, if there'd been sequels, I'd have watched those, too. Right up until they started actually not being atrocious quality, because when the cartoonist aspect of this dross is lost, the emphasis on sexual violence against women suddenly becomes extremely disturbing. I think this production gets away with what it does because it's too bad to be taken seriously.

This movie's a curiosity, and entertainingly bad. For that accidental entertainment value, I've got to give it two stars, as long as it's understood that neither of those stars are for its production values or its morality (or lack thereof), or indeed anything that was intended by the filmmakers.

The stuff legends are made of!

[stsinger · 4/10 · 20 February 2016]

This one is special, guys. Wow, not even sure how to try to describe this thing! Truly, you won't believe your eyes. This goes beyond bad literally into surrealistically bad, which must at least partially have been the plan.

The film begins as Mr D -- a 3D animated character who is very hard to hear and understand -- introduces a series of 10 shorts. None of them are very long (the film runs less than 90 minutes) and they either make a at least a little sense (a woman captures and tortures her husband's mistress), not much sense at all (woman gets killed and wakes up over and over again), to just plain WTF? territory (a cartoon woman is attacked by a cartoon skeleton). The special effects are, for the most part, jaw-droppingly horrible. They are all cheap CGI, and you look at it and say things like, "Is that supposed to be blood pouring out of a hole in that chest?" All this in interspersed with Mr D's introductions which often times also include some weird 3D cartoon violence as well.

Part of the issue is that the lousy CGI effects hurt just when it starts to get good -- there will be some scenes that start to be disturbing and effective and then BAM! -- a cartoon robot shows up driving a cartoon car and the mood is broken.

On the plus side, the actresses (a couple of whom play multiple parts) are shockingly attractive. The hallmark of low budget horror it typically heavily tattooed and pierced "actresses" but not here - - while there is varying degree of acting ability on display, the actresses are all very attractive. And there is a healthy dollop of nudity as well.

Truly, this is the stuff legends are made of. Nobody will believe a movie like this exists and further, no one will believe you actually saw it. It's lousy, and it is not easy to watch through to the end - - it gets tedious fast -- but man oh man, if you're willing to take the leap, I'd go for it.