The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)

The Mystery Date Observation (2015)

Jim Parsons: Sheldon Cooper

Photos 

Quotes 

• Sheldon Cooper : Excuse me, no one does a better job pretending to be a person than I do. Siri comes close, but I know more jokes.

• Raj Koothrappali : How could you send her away?

  Sheldon Cooper : She was late. And she found atomic spectroscopy boring. I wouldn't coitus her with *your* genitals.

• Raj Koothrappali : Maybe you don't want someone exactly like you. You know what they say: opposites attract.

  Sheldon Cooper : By that logic, I should be with someone short, dull and needy. Not to cast aspersions, but I can't shake a stick around here without hitting that.

• Sheldon : That's it! The Sheldon Cooper Girlfriend Challenge is officially alive.

  Howard Wolowitz : Congratulations!

  Raj Koothrappali : This is exciting.

  Sheldon : Right now, somewhere, a woman is dividing the atomic weight of the best noble gas by the number of colors in the oldest national flag still in use!

  Howard Wolowitz : Then using that number as the average speed to calculate the travel time from Mordor to the Shire!

  Sheldon : And taking her first step towards a lifetime of laughter, love and, best of all, rules.

• Sheldon Cooper : That's a lot of carbohydrates for a man on the prowl. But you eat it; you're married; it doesn't matter what you look like.

  Penny Hofstadter : Don't take advice from a man who threw his shoe at a crow.

• Sheldon Cooper : I think of my time with Amy as a stick of Fruit Stripe gum. Sweet and enjoyable at first, but ultimately a flavorless lump of sadness.

  Raj Koothrappali : You're not wrong about Fruit Stripe. I- I was always a Hubba Bubba man.

  Howard Wolowitz : Hubba Bubba over Double Bubble? You're crazy.

  Raj Koothrappali : Hey, the jaw wants what it wants!