- V.M. Varga: The problem is not that there is evil in the world. The problem is that there is good. Because otherwise, who would care?
- V.M. Varga: You can't win this game, you do realize that?
- Nikki Swango: I thought you didn't play games.
- V.M. Varga: I'm offering you a fortune, you're asking for a piggy bank. Pourqoui?
- Nikki Swango: Because I wanna hurt you. Not be your pet. I wanna look you in the face and rip out something you love.
- Emmit Stussy: What's that old quote? The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.
- Moe Dammick: What's his name, again?
- Detective: George.
- Moe Dammick: His last name, asshat.
- Detective: Stussy... George Stussy.
- Gloria Burgle: Got married straight out of high school to a guy I knew since fifth grade summer camp. Summer wedding. Guests were mostly mosquitoes. We had a baby boy, then a toddler, now a teen. Last year, my husband phones me at work, tells me he's got a boyfriend named Dale. Says they're moving in together. Says he's sorry. He loves me, but not like that. "What else is there?" I say. You think the world is something, then it turns out to be something else.
- Nikki Swango: Remind me what you do again.
- V.M. Varga: I work for a company called Narwal.
- Nikki Swango: No, you don't. You tell people you work for a company called Narwal, 'cause people look past middle management. But I know a boss when I see one.
- V.M. Varga: Very good... You just added a zero to your salary.