- Tracy Morgan: [Referring to recovering from his 2014 traffic incident] don't call it "a comeback"
- Self - Host: No, no, no
- Tracy Morgan: I've been here for years
- Self - Host: A year
- Tracy Morgan: Hey Jimbo, I want to thank you man, I want to congratulate you rather, I heard you're beating David Letterman in the ratings
- Self - Host: Thank you very much, I appreciate that, yeah we're excited about that
- Tracy Morgan: [Responding to an audience's comment] his not here no more?
- Self - Host: [Referring to Letterman's retirement] I'll tell you later
- Tracy Morgan: [Eventually slumps down in his chair imitating when he was in a coma] I like that dude. I'm going back in a coma
- Self - Host: [Patting Morgan's left arm] no, no, don't go back
- Tracy Morgan: I'm going back Jim
- Self - Host: Don't do it, we're happy to have you here and it must be weird coming back from the coma, and you come out and things are different
- Tracy Morgan: [Eventually slumps down in his chair imitating when he was in a coma] yeah things are different: Donald Trump is leading in the polls. I'm going back
- Self - Host: Don't go back, it's fine we're going to be ok
- Tracy Morgan: [Sits up straight] alright
- Self - Host: Have you seen the new Star Wars movie?
- Tracy Morgan: Yeah things are different: wait hold up, only one black dude in the entire galaxy?
- Self - Host: I didn't write it
- Tracy Morgan: I'm pissed off man that was Lando Calrissian's nephew. He pulled some strings to him in the cadets
- Self - Host: I didn't know that
- Tracy Morgan: Yeah he got him doing a crappy job, he left a good union job as a Stormtrooper. I tried to get him an application for sanitation
- Self - Host: That's a good job
- Tracy Morgan: I'm going to tell you something man:Chewbacca's not good man. His behind in his child support payments right now
- Self - Host: What're you talking about? Chewbacca doesn't have any... .
- Tracy Morgan: Everybody knows Chewbacca's in rehab right now
- Self - Host: No, Chewbacca's not like that
- Tracy Morgan: These are things I wanted to get off my chest since I got out the coma
- Self - Host: What's wrong with Chewbacca?
- Tracy Morgan: [Referring to Creed, the another new movie he watched] Balboa lost that second fight. Apollo Creed carried that bum for fifteen rounds and two movies.
- Self - Host: Alright, I've got to watch the tape
- Self - Host: I was watching a lot of TV during that whole "drama"
- Tracy Morgan: [Eventually referring to the electronic toll collection system] and I watched The Godfather one hundred and fifty times, let me tell you something: Sonny would've lived if they had E-ZPass.