You're the Worst (TV Series)

The Only Thing That Helps (2016)

Todd Robert Anderson: Vernon Barbara

Photos 

Quotes 

• [Ben Folds resumes playing piano when Jimmy storms out of his own father's funeral] 

  Ben Folds : Hey, folks, if, uh, you're gonna Instagram this, be sure to, uh, hashtag BenFoldsSightings, BenFoldsIsEverywhere, and BenFoldsMovesToLA. If you do, I'll personally tell you what "Brick" is really about.

  Vernon Barbara : Abortion.

  Ben Folds : No.

• Edgar Quintero : Hey. Do you have any weed?

  Vernon Barbara : Can't afford it with this stupid budget Becca's got me on, so I've been smoking dried banana peels. Why don't you just get a pot card?

  Edgar Quintero : The VA says it'll mess with my benefits, but it's, like, the only thing that helps, so... I don't know what to do.

  Vernon Barbara : The doctor in me is like "You're the patient. Take what you've been prescribed, you dumb little bitch."

  Edgar Quintero : Yeah, that's what I figured.

  Vernon Barbara : But the human in me? Is like "Smoke that ganj, yo." Real talk? It's bullroar that you can't get a pot card. You went to war. And straight berserkered on fools. That's an actual reason. Like, everyone at this party has a pot card for a dumb reason. Gretchen said she had insomnia, Lindsay said her back hurt...

  Ben Folds : [holding up his left hand while playing piano with his right]  Piano fingers.

  Edgar Quintero : What reason did you use?

  Vernon Barbara : I just said I saw a dog.

  Edgar Quintero : Did you?

  Vernon Barbara : No, man. Total lie, I didn't see a dog all day. Well, on TV, sure. You can't turn on a TV without seeing, like, three or four of them shits.