Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV Series)

The Good Samaritan (2016)

Clark Gregg: Phil Coulson

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Quotes 

• Jeffrey Mace : [watching Robbie turn into Ghost Rider]  Is he Inhuman?

  Phil Coulson : Claims he made a deal with the devil.

  Leo Fitz : Which is nonsense.

  Phil Coulson : You know, the rationalist in me wants to agree, but skull on fire presents a pretty compelling argument for "Hail Satan".

• Daisy 'Skye' Johnson : Hey, guys? I've got some big, fat, disappointing news. I can't hack in and shut down the plant's operating system from here.

  Leo Fitz : Well, you're out of practice. Too much punching, not enough hacking.

  Daisy 'Skye' Johnson : Very funny. No, I can't hack in because their system isn't on a network. It predates the Internet. Coulson, how did anything ever get done back in the old-timey days?

  Phil Coulson : I ask myself that all the time.

• Phil Coulson : [Director Mace arrives to take Daisy and Robbie into custody]  As a former Director, I have a better sense than most at how precious your time is; how important it is to prioritize the critical from the trivial. Which makes me wonder why you'd waste half a day flying here on a wild goose chase.

  Jeffrey Mace : Oh, it's not a wild goose chase if there are geese. Do you deny they're on board?

  Phil Coulson : Geese? I have zero geese. We are goose-free.

• Jeffrey Mace : We do not negotiate with terrorists.

  Phil Coulson : I don't think it's fair to paint Mr. Reyes as a terrorist.

  Jeffrey Mace : He's a murderer who attacked us and threatened to take down this entire plane if we didn't cede to his demands. How is that not a terrorist?

  Phil Coulson : It sounds a little Fox News to me, but you're not wrong. It doesn't change the fact that we have no way to contain Mr. Reyes. He's also the only person we know who can take out Lucy Bauer. We need him.

  Jeffrey Mace : He'll have to pay for what he did.

  Phil Coulson : I agree. But today's not that day.

• Melinda May : They've re-created the entire experiment.

  Phil Coulson : [finding the Darkhold]  I need you to get this out of here.

  Melinda May : Okay, but shouldn't we dismantle all of this first?

  Phil Coulson : If this book is half as powerful as everyone thinks it is, then getting it out of here and hiding it somewhere safe is our top priority. You're the only one I trust.

• Jeffrey Mace : You know what a hero is?

  Phil Coulson : You really gonna do this?

  Jeffrey Mace : Everybody loves Han Solo; rebel, rule breaker, a lone wolf. But to my old-fashioned sensibilities, he's not a hero. He's just a guy who always puts himself first.

  Phil Coulson : I agree.

  Jeffrey Mace : A real hero is a team player, someone who acts selflessly.

  Phil Coulson : Not sure you heard the part where I agreed. Personally, I always felt that Admiral Ackbar was the unsung hero; a strategic military man who led combat ops against the Empire.

  Jeffrey Mace : Is that how you see it, Phil? S.H.I.E.L.D. is the Empire and your ragtag group is the Rebels?

  Phil Coulson : I've devoted everything to S.H.I.E.L.D. I gave my life for it, literally.

  Jeffrey Mace : Oh, I don't deny that you've done a lot of good in the past, but a true hero doesn't protect a brutal killer.

  Phil Coulson : What are you talking about?

  Jeffrey Mace : Yesterday, your fiery friend killed a prisoner named Santiago Noguera. Was the man a murderer with three strikes? Yes. But the legal system sentenced him to prison, not to death.

• Phil Coulson : He's part of her original dream team. Maybe she needs him to do something she can't.

  Melinda May : What? Show her face without scaring children?

• Phil Coulson : As a former director, I have a better sense than most at how precious your time is, how important it is to prioritize the critical from the trivial, which makes me wonder why you'd waste half a day flying here on a wild goose chase.

  Jeffrey Mace : Oh, it's not a wild goose chase if there are geese. Do you deny they're on board?

  Phil Coulson : Geese? I have zero geese. We are goose free.