DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV Series)

The Good, the Bad and the Cuddly (2018)

Dominic Purcell: Mick Rory

Photos 

Quotes 

• Mick Rory : Looks like Phallus.

  Wally West : Mallus.

• Mick Rory : Hey, idiot. Get out of here. This is a private beach.

  Gary Green : Fancy meeting you lot out here.

  Ray Palmer : Constantine?

  Gary Green : Did you really think I was him? It's me.

  Nate Heywood : Gary, Ray obviously has been day drinking.

  Gary Green : The wig's too much, right?

  Zari Tomaz : No, it's very... presidential.

• Mick Rory : You don't drink.

  Ray Palmer : Yeah, well, we lost Rip.

  Nate Heywood : Okay, somebody's got to say it, so I'm gonna say it.

  Zari Tomaz : This is all our fault.

  Nate Heywood : Apparently I'm not gonna say it, but, yeah, we let Mallus out.

  Mick Rory : Well, whose stupid idea was it to fight him with some magic necklaces?

  Amaya Jiwe : It wasn't the totems that failed. It was us.

  Zari Tomaz : Yeah, we might want to rethink that whole "we screw things up for the better" motto.

• Wally West : Yo, this is tight. I know everyone's dead. I know time is broken.

  [indicating his Old West getup] 

  Wally West : But can we just take a second to acknowledge this?

  Zari Tomaz : You know, as much as I enjoy this getup - and I actually really do - Mallus is still out there.

  Sara Lance : And we'll deal with him, but first, we need to get our heads on straight.

  Zari Tomaz : How long is that gonna take?

  Sara Lance : Depends.

  Zari Tomaz : On what?

  Mick Rory : How strong the whiskey is.

• Mick Rory : If the code is 113, it's off to the bridge for you and me.

  Nate Heywood : You memorized Ray's song?

  Mick Rory : Well, he sings it often enough.

• Amaya Jiwe : Okay, hold hands. Clear your minds, and focus on your breath. Imagine a perfect warrior of justice, mercy, and light.

  [the totems activate; subsequent lines in voiceover thought] 

  Mick Rory : Why does Pretty have such girly hands?

  Nate Heywood : Damn, this Lyoga root is strong. Concentrate, Nate. Think about Voltron, Defender of the Universe.

  Wally West : I kind of pictured myself wielding something cool, like... a lightning totem.

  Zari Tomaz : Am I crazy, or is Jonah Hex hot?

  Sara Lance : Eh, you could do worse than Hex.

  Zari Tomaz : Wait, you can hear me?

  Amaya Jiwe : We can all hear each other.

  Mick Rory : Even what I said about Pretty's girly hands?

  Amaya Jiwe , Nate Heywood , Wally West , Zari Tomaz , Sara Lance : Yes!

• Zari Tomaz : Guys, we did it!. Our totems united to create a single furry love child

  Mick Rory : Worst orgy ever.

• Julius Caesar : Haven't you ever learned never to turn your back on your enemies?

  Mick Rory : Caesar.

  [they fight briefly; Caesar ends up on the ground with a bloody nose] 

  Mick Rory : That's a Roman nose.

• Zari Tomaz : Good call, Mick.

  Mick Rory : When I said Aruba, I meant me, not all of you.

  Nate Heywood : Still, nothing helps a broken heart like a good tan. Should have invited Ava.

  Sara Lance : Oh, we've got plans. And until then, she's busy fixing all those pesky anachronisms we left behind.

  Ray Palmer : Well, that's the thing about defeating an ancient time demon: everything else seems boring.

• Sara Lance : All right, I think it's working. I am on the edges of a plan.

  Zari Tomaz : Great. Let's hear it.

  Sara Lance : So, we know that the six totems are the only thing that can stop Mallus.

  Wally West : They weren't much use to us last time.

  Sara Lance : "Us" being the key word.

  [to Zari] 

  Sara Lance : You and Amaya were born to wield the totems, and the rest of us are just...

  Mick Rory : Losers. That's why Rip picked us; Snart, the professor, those stupid hawk flying-chicken people. We're all expendable.

  Sara Lance : Not that any of these unwashed hayseeds look like righteous totem bearers.

  Jonah Hex : Who you calling a hayseed?

  Sara Lance : Jonah Hex.

  Zari Tomaz : You know this guy?

  Jonah Hex : Me and these ruffians go way back.

• Zari Tomaz : I thought Mallus wasn't supposed to be able to find us here.

  Julius Caesar : Fools. Mallus sees all, knows all.

  Mick Rory : Then why did he bring back you germs to do his business?

  Sara Lance : Because he's probably still recovering from that beatdown Rip gave him.

  Blackbeard : Oh, now, do not confuse Mallus' clemency with weakness, my hearties.

• Julius Caesar : Mallus will spare your lives.

  Wally West : It's actually "Malice".

  Mick Rory : It's actually Mallus.

  Wally West : Nope, Malice.

  Mick Rory : Mallus!

  Zari Tomaz : Guys, it doesn't matter.

  Julius Caesar : If you surrender the six totems.

  Zari Tomaz : Yeah, sorry, we only brought two, and mine's kind of a family heirloom, so...

  Freydis Eriksdottir : Then we have no choice but to march our army on your town and kill every fool who has given you shelter.

  Jonah Hex : You leave my town out of this.

  Blackbeard : You have been warned. We'll be back to collect the totems. Shall we say, high noon tomorrow? Toodles.

• Sara Lance : Weren't all of the original totem bearers actually from Zambesi?

  Amaya Jiwe : But you all wield them now. I mean, do you think that was an accident?

  Sara Lance : Yes, I do.

  Amaya Jiwe : Mick, the chances of you running into your father in Vietnam are next to zero, and yet you did, and you came out a better man for it. Zari, do you remember the way your totem called to mine the moment you put it on? It wanted you to stay with us.

  Wally West : So maybe it wasn't a coincidence that I joined the team.

  Mick Rory : No. That was just another one of the Englishman's crazy ideas.

  Amaya Jiwe : Sara.

  Sara Lance : Mm-hmm.

  Amaya Jiwe : Please. We have to try.

• Amaya Jiwe : I'm gonna use my spirit to provide it with a soul. But without the final totem, our champion will be incomplete.

  Sara Lance : [Amaya holds out the Death totem]  No, it's not happening.

  Amaya Jiwe : Without the Death totem, the other five totems can only imprison Mallus. We need Death to kill him once and for all.

  Mick Rory : Don't worry. If you turn into a witch bitch, I'll kill you.

  Sara Lance : [sarcastic]  Thank you.

  Mick Rory : You're welcome.

• Nate Heywood : It's working!

  Mick Rory : Are we making a baby?

  Amaya Jiwe : Guys, we have to focus.

  Zari Tomaz : You telling us to focus is making it harder to focus.

  Sara Lance : All right, look, this is why we're not worthy of the totems.

  Mick Rory : Seriously, are we making a baby?

  Amaya Jiwe : Everyone, just shut up!

• Mick Rory : Since when did you have time to have a baby? You've only been gone a couple of months.

  Jefferson Jackson : Well, I mean, that's how it is for you guys. But for me, it's been five years.

  [taking out his phone] 

  Jefferson Jackson : Here, look. Her name's Martina. And her and her mom are the light of my life, man.

  Mick Rory : Well, mazel tov.

• Amaya Jiwe : The totems came together when the world needed them most. Now it's time for them to find new bearers. I trust you'll keep them safe until they do, Nana.

  Kuasa : [Nate returns the Earth totem]  Are you sure you don't want the power to move earth, call on the dead?

  Nate Heywood : No, I'm good with just steel.

  Wally West : [returning Water]  And I prefer being a speedster over a water wizard.

  Mick Rory : [returning Fire]  Too old for jewelry.

• Mick Rory : Worst Orgy ever