Criminal Minds (TV Series)

Family Tree (2020)

Kirsten Vangsness: Penelope Garcia

Photos 

Quotes 

• Penelope Garcia : [to herself, after telling JJ's secret]  Not my fault JJ, I told you I wasn't good at keeping secrets

• Penelope Garcia : [about to reveal JJ's secret voluntarily]  Alright, you pulled this out of me and you did not hear it from me

• Penelope Garcia : You guys, we were right to be worried about the things we were worried about

• Penelope Garcia : [picking up her phone]  Full disclosure, fear of change it forces me to continue eating frozen desert food. What do you need?

  Luke Alvez : We think the unsub is the son of a couple who used to live in Beaumont

  Penelope Garcia : Do you think that, newbie? Oh my gosh! You just narrowed the candidates to like 1.2 million people

  Dr. Tara Lewis : It's just the sugar talking

• Penelope Garcia : Spill, why don't you? How was New Orleans?

  Jennifer Jareau : Oh, I... it was wonderful. The boys had a ball getting to know their cousins, Will reconnected with his old crowd and I ate so many oysters, I'm pretty sure I have pearls growing in me

  Dr. Spencer Reid : More likely what's growing inside of you is vibrio vulnificus

  [Garcia frowns at Reid] 

  Dr. Spencer Reid : It's a bacterial contamination caused by eating raw seafood. There's 52,000 cases a year in the United States alone

  Penelope Garcia : [to Reid]  I... forgot... we invited the fun police!

  Penelope Garcia : [to JJ]  Ignore him! That's what lemon juice is for. You squirts that on stuff, and it kills all the bacteria

  Dr. Spencer Reid : I'm so glad you are not my primary care physician

  Jennifer Jareau : Oh, that's gross, so I am gonna change the subject. Can the two of you keep a secret?

  Penelope Garcia : He can, I can't. Tell us anyway

• Penelope Garcia : [while making the call]  You still got it, baby girl!

  Emily Prentiss : [picks up her phone]  What is it Garcia?

  Penelope Garcia : I searched birth records in Beaumont from 1987 to 1992. There were 20,000 babies born, but when you apply Garcia's Law of Diddly-Squat things narrow down considerably

  David Rossi : Law of Diddly-Squat?

  Penelope Garcia : Simply stated: where there should be globs of information about someone or something and you find diddly-squat, there is gold in dem der hills and dig down!

  Emily Prentiss : The gold this time being?

• Luke Alvez : Why do we think the murders are connected?

  Penelope Garcia : Because both of them were missing their tongues and their ears and their hands... and can someone start talking so I can stop thinking about it?