Schitt's Creek (TV Series)

Meet the Parents (2019)

Dan Levy: David Rose

Photos 

Quotes 

• David Rose : Um, speaking of your parents, I've been piecing together that I don't think I ever spoken to them outside of work. Is that weird?

  Patrick Brewer : Okay. I'm sure you... I'm sure you have.

  David Rose : Yeah... Like, they know about me, right?

  Patrick Brewer : Of course they know about you, what do you mean? What are you-why?

  David Rose : Like they know about "us", right?

  Patrick Brewer : [Patrick's face drops, he turns around and sighs]  Um... Okay listen, David. I've have been wanting to tell them about us. I really have, I just was waiting to do it in person, and then I didn't go home for the holidays, and then I was feeling so comfortable with you and your family.

  David Rose : [upset]  Yeah. Yeah, I-I don't know why I assumed, um... So all this time, your parents thought they were just... talking to your... your business partner? Okay.

  Patrick Brewer : [emotional]  David, I know my parents are good people, I just... Hmm... I can't shake this, this fear that... there is a small chance that this could change everything. That they might see me differently, or treat me differently. But I'm gonna deal with this as soon as I see them next, okay?

  David Rose : [Kissing Patrick]  Mmmm-mmmm! Okay, what you're dealing with is very personal. And something you should only do on your terms. Okay? That's why I brought this couple home one day in college, and just told my parents to deal with it.

  Patrick Brewer : I'm a take-charge guy, David. I like to take charge of things in my life, you know that. You're upset. I would be, too.

  David Rose : Yeah. Uh, it's not about that. You're gonna laugh yourself right out of the closet on this one. You know how you've always wanted a surprise party?

  Patrick Brewer : David, I don't think this is how surprise parties work.

  David Rose : Yeah, I know, it's just... part of that surprise was inviting... your parents... here.

  Patrick Brewer : What?

  David Rose : Yeah. I realize that was a big mistake. I should've talked to you.

  [looking nervous] 

  David Rose : I could be just your business partner tonight. If that will help.

  Patrick Brewer : No, David. I, I can't have you do that. I owe it to us to tell them. I want them to know.

  [laughs] 

  Patrick Brewer : Yeah, maybe this whole thing is a blessing in disguise, huh? It's at the cafe?

  David Rose : Yeah. The salmonella was a decoy.

  [David kisses Patrick on the side of his head] 

• Clint Brewer : You've got a really wonderful friend here, Patrick.

  David Rose : Yep, I'm just glad you could make it, Mr. and Mrs. Brewer. Um... well, I should leave you all to catch up, and spend some quality time with your son. But might I recommend the crab cakes? I over-ordered, and they cost a small fortune.

  Patrick Brewer : [to his parents, pointing to David]  Hey, could I just have two seconds with him?

  Marcy Brewer : Sure.

  Patrick Brewer : [Turning to David]  What if they don't react the way I think they will?

  David Rose : [Holding Patrick]  Then I will be here and we'll get through it together.

  Patrick Brewer : Okay, I love you!

  David Rose : I love you!

  [David love taps Patrick] 

• Clint Brewer : [after finding out about their son's sexuality]  Was it something we did, David?

  Marcy Brewer : Honey, stop!

  Clint Brewer : No, I wanna ask. Do you think if we'd done things differently, that Patrick would still be...

  David Rose : I understand that this news can come as a shock... to some people. But he is still the same person, and it's his birthday, and he...

  Marcy Brewer : David, we're not upset about Patrick being gay!

  Clint Brewer : [after David turns and looks at him]  No!

  David Rose : Oh my God, okay! For a minute I thought this was gonna get very dark.

  [David wipes a tear from his eye and clears his throat] 

  Clint Brewer : The thought that Patrick was feeling like he couldn't come and talk to us about this.

  Marcy Brewer : Is it because we were so close with Rachel?

  David Rose : [Johnny knocks at the door]  Hi.

  Johnny Rose : David. Oh, hi. Hi, Clint, Marcy. I see you've met my son. How are you, David? Happy, I hope. Uh, 'cause at the end of the day, that's all that matters, isn't it?

  David Rose : Dad, it's fine. They, they are fine with Patrick being gay.

  [Marcy nods] 

  Johnny Rose : Oh. Oh, good. Good, then no one really has to feel bad about how this information came out, then, huh?

  Marcy Brewer : So what do we do now? Not go to the party? I don't want to make him uncomfortable.

  David Rose : No, no, no, we are all going to the party. Patrick is planning on telling you tonight. So I think the best birthday gift we could give him at this point is to just... keep him in the closet until then. I know that came out wrong, but we all understand what I'm saying, right?

  Marcy Brewer : Okay.

  David Rose : Okay. Whew.

• Patrick Brewer : I know you're annoyed that the surprise got blown but this party may go down as one of the happiest nights of my life.

  David Rose : I guess that makes up for the fact that no one ate the crab cakes.

  Patrick Brewer : So how long have they known?

  David Rose : I'm sorry?

  Patrick Brewer : My parents? How long have they known about us?

  David Rose : I don't, I don't know what you're talking about?

  Patrick Brewer : David! I know my parents. They're not good actors! They knew about us right?

  David Rose : Okay! My dad might have told them but he thought they knew?

  Patrick Brewer : And that gift basket that you gave them, that I'm hoping that you paid for, that had nothing to do with you trying to smooth things over with them?

  David Rose : It was just a very messy day. I was trying to detangle everything and just make things okay.

  Patrick Brewer : Yeah! Well, you made everything okay!

  [David and Patrick begin to passionately kiss each other] 

  Twyla Sands : Not to step on the moment but I do have to lock up in 5.

  Patrick Brewer : Right!

• Johnny Rose : [panting]  Well, I-I just checked in "you know who's" parents.

  David Rose : What? They're not supposed to be here for another 11 minutes!

  Johnny Rose : Well, nothing to worry about. Um, random question for you. They're aware that you and Patrick are uh... romantically involved, right?

  David Rose : Of course they are. Why wouldn't they be?

  Johnny Rose : Well, they're definitely aware that you're business partners, it's just that uh, if I recall, at one point Patrick was engaged... to a woman, so...

  David Rose : Okay, what did you say to them?

  Johnny Rose : Nothing, nothing! It's more how they reacted when I brought up the fact that you two were... romantically in business with each other.

  David Rose : Ew!

  Johnny Rose : Yeah, they-they looked a little... shaken.

  David Rose : Shaken?

  Johnny Rose : Well, upset.

  David Rose : Upset?

  Stevie Budd : David, they know, right?

  David Rose : Of course they know! I wouldn't have asked them to come here if I didn't think they knew we were in a relationship! They call the store all the time! I mean, what do they think, I'm just his business partner?

  Johnny Rose : Possibly.

  Stevie Budd : I mean, yeah.

  David Rose : Oh my God! Okay! Everybody calm down! Nobody say a word to anybody!

  Stevie Budd : Well, that sounds reasonable.

  David Rose : What did I just say?

• Stevie Budd : He's coming! He's coming!

  David Rose : Okay, he's coming, he's coming. We're going to shout out SURPRISE because HAPPY BIRTHDAY was too wordy and we couldn't nail it at the rehearsals.

  Stevie Budd , David Rose : SURPRISE!

  Patrick Brewer : OH MY GOD DAVID! You told me we were going out for a casual dinner?

  Johnny Rose : Happy birthday Patrick!

  [Patrick hugs David then he goes over and hugs his parents] 

  Alexis Rose : Happy birthday!

  Patrick Brewer : What is going on? You told me you were out of town?

  Clint Brewer : Well, we are!

• David Rose : Okay, so I told Patrick that there's a salmonella outbreak at the cafe, so he will not be coming here until I tell him to tonight.

  Twyla Sands : Oh. Is it possible you could maybe choose a lie that doesn't make the cafe look like it's in violation of health codes?

  David Rose : I think it's a pretty good one.