Philip K Dick stories make great films. Blade Runner and Total
Recall are standouts in recent science fiction flicks and Minority
Report is a complete exception. Good Lord in heaven above- how
did they get it so wrong?
Having Jan De Bont as producer didn't help ( can anyone watch
Twister a second time? Let alone- ugh let's not go there...)
The plot as such- future crime, these mutant pre-cogs have
visions of murders about to be committed, Tom and co have to run
around stopping them at the last second- great idea.
Add a ton of pointless arty grain look, trashy blue-green grading,
overblown lighting, appalling sfx with the tell-tale blurry out of focus
of a job shoddily done, rip off Fifth Element and how many other
flicks and ram the whole thing into an overlong chaotic mess.
Such hopes I had! Kaminski behind the camera, Spielberg ready
to make up for the dogs' breakfast that was A.I., Scott Frank at the
typewriter, the Cruisester, Max Von Sydow- how could you go
wrong?
Here's how.
Too long, too slow, too showy, too damn obvious ( you don't have
to be a pre-cog to work out who the surprise bad guy is on his first
appearance) and too long.
Please cut 20 or 30 minutes!!! Please!!! You could start with the
repeated explanations of what's happening ( in the 3rd act!!!),
which is repeated 10 minutes later for all the people who are
asleep in the audience. If you're explaining what it's about twice in
the last half hour you have a bigger problem than anything I've
mentioned and you should be recutting not releasing.
But enough of the petty stuff- some good news. There are two
good scenes (Peter Stormare as druggy doctor making no sense
is hilarious) and a handful of good jumps ( girlfriend threw
popcorn everywhere by reflex action- a good sign, but more due to
sound editing) and a lovely scene in a greenhouse.
Colin Farrell is great and shines, Kathryn Morris; so good in
Deterrence and The Contender, is wasted here as the estranged
wife. Is this her reward for being so underutilised in A.I.?
Methinks not. Tim Blake Nelson, Lois Smith, yes, some lovely
stuff. But here's what you want- PLOT HOLES!!!
If the future is so hi-tech that freeway scanners can find your iris in
a car, why don't they shut off Tom's security clearance to pre-cog
central once he's on the run? and once he's caught- they still don't
do it. P.S. Do they have safety glass in the future? apparently not...
The people mentioned have given me some of my favourite
moments ever in films ( even Jan did nice camera once upon a
time) But this entire film blows like a runny nose.
Next time Hollywood stops and holds its' breath while La
Spielberg decides what he will deign to do next, don't.
Just don't. Mr S, come out of your castle and mix with some real
people, maybe then you'll get back to making films we can realte
to.
1/10 (for Peter Stormare and Caroline Lagerfelt)
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