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Reviews
Top of the Food Chain (1999)
ingenious sci fi parody
In my area, this movie is available to rent as "Invasion!" It also has a holographic box, and the picture of Campbell Scott looks eerily like Martin Sheen. Don't let any of these factors deter you from renting the movie. It is a little known gem. Even video clerks don't know about it, they'll look on you with scorn when you bring it to the counter. But it's worth their scorn, trust me.
This movie parodies the original Invasion of the Body Snatchers, as well as other 50's sci fi classics. But it doesn't just do a basic plot parody with dumb jokes plastered over it, a la Airplane or other Hollywood broad parodies. Top of the Foodchain gets into little details, like making fun of how all men in 50's sci fi seem to have traditionally female names (see cast list) or the bizarre, ham handed way that those movies dole out religious platitudes and hypocritically pro- and anti-science ideology.
Campbell Scott is, as usual, dead on in his mimicry -- this time of 50's leading man mannerisms. He's got the reassuring shoulder clap *down*. Every little nuance of this movie is brilliant and surprisingly innovative in spite of the fact that the movie is a spoof. I'm giving credit to the Canadians on this one. I doubt this movie would have been as funny or insane had it been done in the States. Do not miss Invasion! or Top of the Food Chain or whatever it's called in your neighborhood. It is smart, funny and will always be one of my personal all time favorite rentals.
What Lies Beneath (2000)
terror and adrenaline
This movie is a *lot* scarier than the publicity makes it out to be. People were screaming and whimpering in terror all through the screening I went to. Most of the scares come in the form of cheap "BOO!!" shocks (an average of one a minute, pretty much) or cringe-inducing stuff like watching Michelle Pfieffer descend a long flight of stairs barefoot and BACKWARDS. Lots of scenes borrow heavily from Rear Window, Ghost and Psycho, but for the most part these references end up taking the form of homage, so it's all good. Many parts of the story are obvious and some foreshadowing is just plain ham-handed, but virtuoso camera work and a nerve-wracking third act make up for any plot weaknesses. It works best as a thriller, but the ghost stuff will appeal to fans of Peter Straub's novels.
8 ½ Women (1999)
the adventures of two penises
Writer/Director Peter Greenaway cements his title as the High Lord of Art House Pretension with his latest exercise in obnoxious self-indulgence, 8 ½ Women. The film follows a wealthy Englishman and his son on their mutual quest for sexual satisfaction, as they lure and blackmail women (guess how many) into joining their personal collection of concubines.
Think of any possible way that this premise could be offensive, and chances are Greenaway's done it. The female characters are little more than a catalogue of fetishes for the two protagonists to partake of. There's the Kabuki-obsessed Mio, the ever-pregnant Giaconda and Beryl, who's got a thing for farm animals. Giulietta has no legs and uses a wheelchair, she's the "half woman," get it? Greenaway vehemently denies all accusations of misogyny, but if this isn't it, then what is?
The film goes on to eroticize anything and everything having to do with Japan, a continuation of themes from his snore-worthy (but less sexist) 1996 film, The Pillow Book. But where the The Pillow Book was erotic and graceful, 8 ½ Women just gets horny and exploitative. Greenaway's work is tasteless and arrogant in its fetishism, and the only person likely to enjoy watching it is the auteur himself.
Deep Blue Sea (1999)
dialogue written by intelligent sharks would have been better
The major failing of this movie lies in the pathetic dialogue. You can see the actors straining so hard to be convincing while being forced to mouth insipid one-liners when a shark appears. The characters neatly fit into creature-feature archetypes set down long ago in the Alien movies (with LL Cool J doing a passable impersonation of Charles-Dutton-meets-Yaphet-Kotto.) But some fun plotting turns the unoriginal characterizations to the film's advantage. Playing the "who gets eaten next?" game has rarely been this challenging. Maybe it's because the sharks are smarter this time, they've decided to mix things up a little. . .
Moontrap (1988)
A must-see for Bruce Campbell fans
I couldn't stop laughing at this ridiculous piece of trash. Besides being a blatant Alien rip-off in numerous spots, Moontrap is a pleasure to watch (and to mock.) I won't give away any of the story (such as it is. . .the plot alternately follows blindingly obvious conventions, or shoots off in totally random, silly directions without warning.) I will say, however, that Campbell is in rare comic form in his big scene towards the end of the film, and the rest of the cast unintentionally gets almost as many laughs as him while trying to be really intense, serious NASA employees. The music is almost as entertaining as the rest of the film in its utter crappiness, again stealing from the Alien movies in the final climactic scenes. Basically, Moontrap would have been a perfect candidate for the tv show MST3K. If you enjoy wallowing in the sickly sweet stench of terrible science fiction as much as I do, rent this movie immediately.