PeplumParadise Reviews

Le meravigliose avventure di Guerrin Meschino (1952)

Wonderful Adventures Of Guerrin Meschino

[6/10 · 20 March 2014]

OK, as far as I was able to discern watching this in Italian, of which I understand about 40%, and from tallying what's on screen with several poorly auto-translated synopses, what we have here is a pretty fanciful account of events surrounding the fall of Constantinople loosely based on a popular 14th century poem, so any bearing on real events or indeed the work it is based on would appear to be rather coincidental.

The story, written and directed by Pietro Francisci (Hercules), centres on Guerrin Mescino (Gino Leurini), a servant of unknown parentage working in the court of the Emperor, and carrying on an illicit affair with his headstrong daughter Elisenda (Leonora Ruffo), who has a habit of bursting into operatic song.

After anonymously defending the Princess's honour in a rather unfair joust he rides off in search of the truth surrounding his birth (no prizes for guessing the that he's really born of nobility), but when she is kidnapped he of course comes to the rescue.

The villains come in the form of invading Turkish King Murad (Cesare Fantoni) and his four sons including Selim (his real-life son Sergio) and vicious bug-eyed Pinamonte (hammy Giacomo Giuradei).

Thrown into the mix you also have a few fantastical elements including a wizard (Gian Paolo Rosmino), a glamorous sorceress (Tamara Lees), plus a giant and a large killer crocodile, all of which are thrown in and so quickly dispatched that they barely register.

It manages to be fairly entertaining despite making little sense, clearly having a middling budget and veering a little uncomfortably between broad comedy and some quite unpleasant violence with the odd romantic interlude, racing rather hurriedly to it's predictable happy ending while spending a little too much time on early plot development and too little on the "wonderful adventures" of the title.

For more of my peplum reviews check out my "Peplum Paradise" lists on IMDb.

Il tesoro del Bengala (1953)

Sabu in his only Italian peplum

[5/10 · 19 March 2014]

Man-child Sabu was well past his Hollywood sell-by date at age 29 when he came to Italy (following in the footsteps of his recently deceased frequent co-star Maria Montez) to appear in this Indian-set jungle adventure.

Co-starring are a wide-eyed 18-year-old Luisella Boni as a native Princess, alongside genre regulars Luigi Tosi and Carla Calo, with an unfamiliar supporting cast.

The only available DVD is in German, so once again the finer plot points were lost on me, but it would appear to be your standard jungle shenanigans that Sabu's fans would expect, complete with tigers, kidnappings, belly dancers and lots of running about in the undergrowth.

Sabu looks a little bloated and is clearly wearing a thick coating of panstick to hide his maturing features, but otherwise equips himself fine in a role he could probably have played in his sleep.

Whether or not it's any good I couldn't really say without watching it in a language I can understand, but it's colourful, well shot and has enough action to keep genre fans satisfied – a climactic sword fight on a beach is a highlight.

For more of my peplum reviews check out my Peplum Paradise lists on IMDb

Lisístrata (2002)

Outrageously camp Spanish comedy

[8/10 · 13 July 2013]

This is a quite outrageous Spanish comedy set in ancient Greece.

The women of Athens, led by stunning Maribel Verdu in the title role, barricade themselves in the Acropolis with the intention of blackmailing their men into stopping the war by starving them of sex.

Their plan backfires when, after several days of the men walking round with raging erections, the gay underground suggest that the men might find other ways to satisfy their desires.

The men try it, and they like it!

This is more outrageously camp than laugh out loud funny, but it's a lot more enjoyable than the other reviewers on IMDb would have you believe, and quite a rare beast in being a film with a gay message that sticks to it's guns, even if the instigators are portrayed as a bunch of screaming queens.

Il capitano di ferro (1962)

Revenge Of The Mercenaries

[6/10 · 5 February 2013]

This is one of those obscure ones where an Internet search will leave you none the wiser plot- wise.

It opens with Furio (Gustavo Rojo), the "Captain of Iron" of the original title, returning to his village to find it burned to the ground by German usurper Walter von Rauchwitz (Mario Petri), who seems to be on a one-man mission to conquer 16th century Italy and assassinate the pope.

While taking his own sweet time getting revenge between having a good time in his favourite tavern, Furio also finds time to romance both gypsy Douchka (Susan Terry / Silvana Jachino) and von Rauchwitz's fiancée Floriana (Barbara Steele, whose screen time doesn't really justify her second billing), his rather willing prisoner.

Petri gets to wear some fabulous designer leather wear and has a really protracted death scene while Barbara gets ravished by a hunchback – what's not to like!

One thing you can be sure of is that the sets must have been really cold as you can clearly see the actors breath in nearly every scene.

Sadly not some undiscovered classic, but it is good light-hearted fun and the pace keeps up throughout, so it's certainly deserving of a better fate than the obscurity it currently enjoys.

Finally, contrary to what the IMDb listing says, the film is not in black and white, but is in fact in glorious colour!

L'avventuriero della Tortuga (1965)

Cold Steel For Tortuga

[5/10 · 31 January 2013]

Cheaply produced, but enthusiastic, period piratical peplum comedy.

Guy Madison is the nominal star wearing the most unflattering star hairpiece since Bette Davis was the Virgin Queen, but is unconvincing as Alfonso di Montelimar, a governor on an island off the Spanish Main.

Imported German leading lady Ingeborg Schöner - in her only peplum appearance - is equally at sea as a white-skinned red Indian princess, accompanied by Mino Doro looking odd in brown face as her silent Indian servant (or should that be native Tortugan?).

The film belongs to third-billed Rik Battaglia as the dashing pirate captain Pedro Valverde, who steals every scene he is in and, with his piratical band of peplum stalwarts, lifts the film to another level.

There's a native wedding ceremony towards the end which is rather bizarre, you feel like you've just walked in onto a set from another movie altogether.

It's one of those piratical a yarns where they seem to spend most of the time on land and even when they do make it on board a ship they don't actually go anywhere.

It's also one of those where you root for the pirates, despise the authorities and cheer for the hard-done-by natives who come to the rescue, all done with enough panache to keep it lively, but be wary that there's not much there if you dig beneath the surface.

Avenger of the Seven Seas (1962)

Pirate Peplum Fun

[6/10 · 28 January 2013]

Rollicking pirate adventure on the high seas with Richard Harrison on top physical and acting form. Unusually violent for the time it was made, it features a novel angle where the pirates are the good guys and the British navy the baddies.

David Robinson (Harrison) is on the warpath after crooked British naval Captain Redway (Roldano Lupi), his former commander and the man responsible for the downfall of his family. To achieve his goal he teams up with jolly pirate Van Artz (Walter Barnes).

Michele Mercier, making one of her three Italian peplum appearances here playing the role of Jennifer, Van Art's daughter and David's love interest, went on to become a major European star with the "Angelique" series a few years later.

You also have some of the most unconvincing blackface this side of Al Jolson courtesy of "mulata" Marisa Belli, not the most attractive of women in the first place, and boot-polished up she just looks strange.

Things briefly take a turn for the very odd towards the end when Jennifer is sold to some natives who have a man-eating plant to placate and David has to come to save her – this sequence is so bizarre, even filmed with different colour filters, that it looks like it belongs in another film altogether.

It's all good uninvolving Saturday matinée style fun.

Razia Sultana (1961)

A fantasy history lesson

[8/10 · 27 September 2012]

The title before the start of the film reads "The main characters of this picture are drawn from history but the plot and the incidents are fictitious", thereby giving the makers complete licence to totally fabricate the events of the life of India's first female ruler, but that really doesn't matter.

It starts off looking worryingly like a religious picture with groups of people going off on a pilgrimage, but fear not, after five minutes of this things pick up as we are suddenly transported to the royal palace and introduced to tomboy Hindustani Princess Razia (Nirupa Roy), her chubby drag queen brother (really!) Prince Feroz (Agha), and her evil other brother Prince Seemab (Nisar Ahmad Ansari).

Razia is carrying on an illicit relationship with war hero Altunia (Jairaj – bad hair day), but he mistakes her friendship with faithful servant Yakut (Kamran) to be something more, and goes off to rule the Punjab.

When the old Emperor dies, about an hour in, with both his sons in disgrace, he names Razia to be his successor, which given the Indian belief that women should be subservient to men causes no end of problems.

It takes Yakut's death to reunite Razia and Altunia, but then they still her rebel brothers to contend with.

The songs are quite delightful, the performances strong, the pace pretty hectic despite the length, and the melodrama quite hysterical if a little confusing in parts. Pretty much all you could want from a 60's Bollywood picture.

Kali Yug, la dea della vendetta (1963)

Part 1 of a forgotten epic

[6/10 · 21 June 2012]

This is the first part of of a pair of films which bear many similarities to Fritz Lang's Indian Epic, not least being that that too was filmed in two parts and on location in India.

French actor Paul Guers is a bit of a damp squib in his first lead, as a doctor whose shipment of serum intended for a plague-stricken village is stolen, supposedly by servants of the Goddess Kali, and who is then blamed for the murder of a British officer with his only witness another officers wife. I'm afraid that the intricacies of the plot were lost on me since the only DVD release to date is from Germany and I only have a basic understanding of that language.

The film is a bit over ambitious in trying to cover both the Hindu religion and the British occupation of India, but at least boasts impressive location work, beautiful sets, and an eccentric international supporting cast.

Of these you have Lex Barker, Ian Hunter (in his last film) and stunning Senta Berger comprising the British contingent, while the Indians are made up of trouble-making sect leader Sergio Fantoni, Klaus Kinski, Roldano Lupi and temple dancer Claudine Auger, all in typically unconvincing black face, with genuine Indian I.S. Johar thrown in for good measure and comic relief.

Unfortunately the storyline would appear to be too slight to warrant the obvious expense which has been spent here, and the fact that the film received a very limited international release outside the countries that funded it, and remains obscure to this day, would tend to back this up.

It does look absolutely beautiful in the German DVD release, but unless you have a good understanding of that language then I'm afraid I would find it difficult to recommend other than as a bit of an ordeal for the curious. There are poor quality English language prints around, but this film really needs to be seen in a decent print to be appreciated.

The Accidental Gangster and the Mistaken Courtesan (2008)

Fist fighting for fun

[8/10 · 14 June 2012]

This is a likable, if rather daft, slapstick comedy, of which about 75% is completely hilarious whilst the remaining 25% is just silly and misses the mark.

That the movie is as enjoyable as it is, is entirely down to the central performance of Lee- Jung Jae as Cheon-doong, a street fighter who through a bizarre series of events finds himself leader of a powerful gang with devoted followers.

The story involves his rivalry with foppish gang leader Man-deuk (Kim Suk-Hoon) and his slightly underdeveloped romance with courtesan Seol-ji (Kim OK-bin).

The period setting of 1724 is pretty nominal since from the clothing and music it could just as easily be set in some modern-day villages.

If you're expecting a standard action or oriental historical piece you'll likely come out disappointed, but if you're after a killer off the wall comedy along the lines of Kung Fu Hustle then this film is for you.

Knight of 100 Faces (1960)

Lex Barker goes through the motions

[6/10 · 11 June 2012]

In Germany this was pushed as a sequel to the similarly-themed Captain Falcon which also starred Lex Barker and Livio Lorenzon, while the French went one step further actually calling Barker's character Robin Hood, but the Italians and English opted for the rather ambiguous Knight Of 100 Faces which has no real relevance at all.

Barker plays Riccardo D'Arce, a good hearted outlaw in the Robin Hood mould, though going by the names the film would appear to be set in medieval Italy or Spain.

The villains are Lorenzon as the Count Fosco di Vallebruna and Howard A.E. Böhme as Duke Ambrosia di Pallanza. Bianca (Annie Alberti), the Duke di Pallanza's beautiful daughter is engaged to Fosco but in love Riccardo, while his son Ciro (Alvaro Piccardi) is Riccardo's best friend and in love with one of Riccardo's band of rebels, feisty gypsy Zuela (Liana Orfei), who is also desired by Fosco.

When Ciro is killed by Fosco's men Riccardo is blamed for the murder, but when the Duke announces a tournament (the films colourful highlight) for Bianca's hand in marriage, at Zuela's suggestion, Riccardo cunningly eliminates many of the rivals, but then falls ill himself. Will he recover in time to prove his innocence and win the tournament?

This has it's share of mildly amusing light hearted moments, including one with Barker in drag, but is little more than a mildly enjoyable briskly-paced fluffy time filler with the stars all on autopilot in roles they were overly familiar with from other pictures.

There are numerous editing differences between the 91 minute English and 75 minute German language prints, with the English version (available from Atlas Visuals) containing several scenes missing from the German one (an official EMS DVD release) and many extended scenes, accounting for the substantial differences in length.

Seven Rebel Gladiators (1965)

Best of the 'Seven Gladiators' trilogy

[8/10 · 7 June 2012]

Billed as a sequel to Seven Slaves Against Rome, though actually with a substantially different bunch of gladiators (of the original seven only Pietro Ceccarelli remains, plus Roger Browne and Arnaldo Fabrizio, while Alfio Caltabiano has switched sides), this is the sort of non-stop romp which makes no sense whatsoever-where it's predecessor was reality based this one is quite bonkers and great fun.

It also features the unexpected return of the Mole Men (from the totally unrelated Mole Men Against The Son Of Hercules), or at least their identical twins with white fright wigs intact, who still live in a pretty impressive underground city entered via a trap door under some leaves.

In addition to the usual brawls this one does have a few original touches-the scene where the gladiators enter a palace all wearing false beards Is a classic, and a scene where they disguise themselves as dancing girls is quite unique!

In addition to Ceccarelli and Browne the gladiators here are played by the familiar faces of Harold Bradley, Mario Novelli, Jeff Cameron, Nazzareno Zamperla and Pietro Torrisi, with Dakar unfortunately only getting a brief but memorable role as their ruthless trainer.

Jose Greci, second billed as the love interest, barely gets a look in.

I have no clue as to why many of the familiar Italian cast chose to use strange Americanised pseudonyms, mostly adopted solely for this release, even in the films Italian release.

Played largely for laughs and with more money spent on sets and costumes than the other films in the series (or at least more leftovers borrowed!), this one is quite outrageous and enjoyably daft from start to finish.

This received a wide international cinema release originally, but like so many other sword and sandal movies today is sadly neglected, and the only DVD available anywhere to date is a rather good widescreen (but not letterboxed) Italian release from Eagle. Someone needs to get on the ball and realise that there is a substantial international market for a good quality English language release of these films.

Lucrèce Borgia (1953)

Best Borgias of the peplum era

[9/10 · 6 June 2012]

The infamous Borgia family who ruled Italy in the 15th and 16th centuries and the scandals surrounding them have provided juicy fodder for film and television since the very beginning, and were the subject of at least seven Italian productions during the golden years of peplum ('49-'69), of which this predominantly French production was the first, and reputedly the best, though several appear to be missing presumed lost.

This lavish, lively and colourful film focuses on Lucrezia Borgia (doe-eyed Martine Carol), her second marriage of convenience to and romance with Spaniard Alphonse D'Aragon (Massimo Serato, looking youthful and handsome), and the succession of lovers who follow him.

Of the many scandals which surround the Borgia family legend, the incestuous relationship with her brother Cesar (Pedro Armendariz) is strongly hinted at but not shown, her reputation as a woman of loose morals is ably demonstrated, Lucrezia suffers kicking and whipping at the hands of her brother, numerous foes are assassinated by an assortment of means, while the family's penchant for cruelty is adequately displayed in one scene where they laugh as prisoners are publicly tortured for their entertainment, and another where men are hunted and killed for sport.

Martine Carol, who at 33 is rather too old to convincingly play the role of an 18 year old, does get several quite-shocking-for-their-time naked bath scenes which leave practically nothing to the imagination, not to mention a fairly graphic orgy scene featuring numerous topless women, which were cut for international release.

Production values are high with beautiful costumes and sets, while the performances are uniformly excellent and the script is constantly engaging, making this one of the most enjoyable and compelling of the peplum costume dramas.

Hercules of the Desert (1964)

Hercules and the Valley Girls

[5/10 · 27 April 2012]

The presence of Kirk Morris in a peplum could usually be a guaranteed sign of weirdness (Atlas against the Czar, Witch's Curse), and here is no exception.

A rather dull Maciste/Hercules-worshipping cult (who bear a worrying resemblance to the standard peplum portrayal of Christians) conjure up their hero in a ceremony involving lots of smoke and sparks, and before you know it he's throwing things around, hobnobbing with royalty, and rescuing the rather ordinary valley girls (as the French title calls them).

Helene Chanel does her standard turn as the evil Queen Masura with fabulous hair and a whip who is in cahoots with with duplicitous Alberto Farnese, while Spela Rozin is the drippy love interest, Nando Tamberlani is the high priest and Rosalba Neri is wasted as a hand maiden who is Farnese's bit on the side.

It's all pretty average stuff, not bad with Morris heavily tanned and looking buff, but with nothing to set it apart from the pack.

Colossus of the Arena (1962)

Colossus Of The Arena

[6/10 · 22 March 2012]

Following a thrilling opening sequence in the arena, seven champion gladiators and a monkey (including Vadis, Caltabiano, Calisti and Bradley), are hired for a mysterious purpose.

When the unruly gang cause a riot in an inn, local do-gooder Maciste (Mark Forest, with serious bad hair problems and wearing lime green) is called upon to come to the aid of the people, but instead suffers humiliation when he takes on the gladiators in the ring.

It is eventually revealed that the seven have been hired to help de-throne just, but dull, Queen Thalima (Scilla Gabel).

Maciste, of course, finally manages to muster his strength, and defeats the villains one by one.

Played mostly for laughs and with plenty of beefcake on show, this is mildly entertaining if you can tolerate whining aged midgets, upstart chimps and effeminate black men in drag!

Capitani di ventura (1961)

For leather fetishists only

[3/10 · 1 March 2012]

Mario Petri gets a rare lead role as villainous Captain Hans, a German soldier of fortune. He looks quite ridiculous, wearing a shiny winged black leather waistcoat and thigh high boots, looking like he just stepped out of some fetish bar, and dubbed with a rather infuriating squeaky voice. In spite, or possibly because of this, Petri is really the only reason to watch here, milking every line for all it's worth and playing to the gallery.

Giving Petri a run for his money in the scenery chewing stakes you have Paul Muller as a count out to rule the local Duchy.

Also along for the ride, and for the most part seeming to appear in a different story altogether, you have Gerard Landry as the dashing hero Brunello, sporting his own distinctive designer leatherware, and Wandisa Guida as the drippy Duchess Belinda who falls, literally, for his charms.

There can't have been much money left after paying for the kinky costumes because the sets here are some of the most minimal you'll ever see, and unfortunately 90% of the film consists of people standing around chatting and plotting in them.

What little plot there is consists of Brunello having to free Prince Giuliani (Luigi Batzella) whom Hans has captured along with some treasure belonging to the pope.

Attack of the Moors (1959)

Enjoyable peplum romp

[7/10 · 2 January 2012]

With perennial bridesmaid Battaglia the nominal star, a virtual who's who of peplums finest supporting players are given their chance to shine (and it should be noted this film is missing from many CV's on the IMDb).

There must have been some mix-up in the casting department the day that Chelo Alonso was cast as an Arab princess while Liana Orfei was given the role of a feisty Spanish dancer, but casting curiosities aside this is a highly enjoyable romp, with the unimportant plot having something to do with battles between French nobility, Spanish gypsies and Arabian infidels.

Anyone who studied Othello at school may be somewhat confused by a distinct lack of moors!

The (rather posh) English language version available from Atlas Visuals has been dubbed on top of, rather than in place of, the Italian original, giving the effect that there are constantly people talking in the background, amusing at first but it does begin to grate after awhile (adding to the confusion the opening credits are in German!).

Wa Islamah (1961)

Italian/Egyptian peplum

[7/10 · 5 December 2011]

Well this is certainly an oddity if ever there was one, the first, and quite possibly only, Italian/Egyptian co-production, with an appropriate budget.

It would appear that there were two versions of the film shot simultaneously, one using an all-Egyptian cast-which is the only one currently available and the one reviewed here, and another version using the more familiar likes of Pampanini and Lulli in the leads but retaining the Egyptian supporting cast.

Don't let the title put you off, while there is mention of the Islamic religion and the female lead is named Jihad (solely so she can stand on a rock during the final battle shouting "to Jihad" it would appear), this is far less preachy and in your face about it's religion than many American and Italian productions like, say, Ben-Hur.

The storyline is downright ridiculous, but enjoyably so, mixing real-life events and characters with a couple of royal offspring, Jihad and Mahmoud, branded and sold into slavery as children for their own safety, then rediscovered years later as adults by the now blind protector who first sold them.

When the wicked Sultana Shagrat al-Durr (Cariocca) and her equally obnoxious suitors are assassinated in succession the throne is left open for Mahmoud (Mazhar) to conveniently step in just as the Mongols (here referred to throughout as taters!) are about to invade-an authentic event dating from 1260.

The Egyptian DVD release has been nicely restored, though the letterboxed print is slightly condensed, and it does contain English subtitles.

The acting is, for the most part, more controlled than in other Egyptian films of the period that I've seen, but still works better today for a western audience as camp comedy than historical tale.

Kabli Khan (1963)

Colourful and confusing

[6/10 · 28 October 2011]

Nothing to do with Xanadu or stately pleasure domes, this one concerns kingdoms called Yakistan and Kohistan during some undefined historical period, which have been invaded by someone called Shahbaaz (Samson), who appears to be a bit of a Mongol.

Luckily local hero Kabli Khan (Ajit) is on hand to organise a resistance force.

The always delightful Helen, a year before she became Dara Singh's main on screen squeeze, dances up several dervishes in her inimitable style and even gets to act a little bit as a spy called Haseena (it apparently translates as "a beauty"), who deceives Kabli Khan before falling for his charms-this despite or possibly because of him calling her a whore. Be warned though that despite her second billing she doesn't appear until half an hour in.

Pretty much the whole cast seem to only have one name, which saves me some typing, but must have gotten awfully confusing when you got two actors with the same name appearing in the same film, whilst 90% of the characters in this film have the surname Khan, which is just as confusing.

Further confusion arises from the soldiers on opposing sides both wearing red uniforms, with the notable exception of Shahbaaz's son, Halaku (Salim), who favours going into battle dressed in bright candy pink.

The film is colourful, and every time you have a scene transition the screen flashes up bright red or fluorescent green, which is certainly an interesting, if bizarre, effect, and does seem to be intentional rather than some fault with the DVD.

Production values don't appear to be very high, with the sets looking shoddy and the costumes rather knock off, and there's a lot more talk than action, but it's also fairly well paced, enjoyably daft (Khan's horse sneaking in and out of prison unnoticed anyone?) and a likable enough time-passer.

Rustom-E-Rome (1964)

This movie stars Dara Singh, not Mumtaz!

[6/10 · 14 October 2011]

Firstly let's correct a major IMDb faux pas. This movie does not feature Mumtaz at all, but does star Bollywood's favourite wrestler Dara Singh, who is noticeable in his absence from the cast list on here.

The running time, also omitted here, is 113 mins, rather a short one by Bollywood standards.

Well from the title I was half hoping that this would find Dara Singh in a Bollywood Roman gladiator epic. What exactly was going on I'm still not sure since the only available copy was the Indian VCD release which is unsubtitled and the only synopsis online (namely the one on here) was more confusing than helpful.

The costumes appear to be a strange mixture of ancient Roman done in a Bollywood style, and there are also sphinxes. The names are distinctly Indian, while the online synopsis places it in kingdom called Jamah which doesn't appear to exist, so exactly where and when it's supposed to be set is anyone's guess.

After some confusion about lost babies at the beginning it isn't long before Dara Singh appears (I'm guessing he's one of the infants now grown up), and is wrestling someone gladiator-style in an arena while a crowd looks on.

From here on in there are wrestling bouts and fights at regular intervals, some spirited musical numbers, Dara in a fetching leopard skin dress, and some kind of intrigue involving a villain in a furry mask and an imprisoned princess being repeatedly rescued.

The synopsis on here suggests that a stolen knife plays a major part in the plot, though this detail completely passed me by.

Fans of Dara Singh will find plenty of what they came for, namely wrestling, Hindi speakers may well find an involving storyline, while anyone else will probably find themselves up a creek without a paddle.

The Secret Seven (1963)

Peplum-lite

[6/10 · 11 October 2011]

This is another of those films which originally received a wide international release, but today remains mysteriously absent in any English language print or even any European language DVD release, so here I am reviewing it from a ropey DVD-R in Italian with Greek subtitles, with only a Spanish press release to guide me (which fortunately I do understand).

The setting is 4th century A.D. Sidon (in modern day Lebanon), not that this has any real relevance to the plot.

Axel (Serato), a rebel, is captured and condemned to death by tyrannical King Rabirio (Tichy). Meanwhile Axel's brother Leslio (Russel) has bought the freedom of five rebel slaves (including Baldini and Lorenzon), and enlists their help in rescuing him.

Returning to their village Leslio and Axel discover that their mother (Baron) has been killed by Rabirio's troops, so the seven plan their revenge, kidnapping an architect. Leslio then poses as the architect gaining entrance to the palace, and discovers his old flame Lidia (Line) is now Rabirio's lover, but it's not long before she falls for his charms again.

The seven capture a gold shipment destined for Rabirio, but then he discovers Leslio's true identity, imprisoning him and threatening to kill Lidia if he doesn't hand over his accomplices.

The remaining six naturally come to his aid and peace is restored when Rabirio is killed in a pretty impressive stampede.

This is an enjoyable enough romp, but it's definitely peplum-lite with a by-numbers plot, the reliable genre cast coasting on autopilot, Line wasted with little to do, and Tichy a bit of a damp squib in the villain department.

Char Dervesh (1964)

Colourful, camp and disjointed

[6/10 · 4 October 2011]

Pretty boy Feroz Khan, it has to be said, here treats us to some of the least convincing athletic displays, swashbuckling and chase sequences I've ever seen, all the time wearing the requisite pink satin pants favoured by "butch" male leads in Bollywood historical pics.

He plays an impetuous youth called Qamar, who falls in love with a princess (Sayeeda Khan), but is exiled to the Black Island for sneaking into her palace boudoir.

En route his nasty brothers toss him overboard, along with the obligatory gay dwarf sidekick for company, and they wind up on a rock which promptly sinks.

It then gets all surreal when they come across an undersea kingdom where they worship a god who looks like Mr. Spock, and there's another princess being held captive by an evil sorcerer.

To free themselves they have to do battle with a golden two-headed giant, and enlist the help of an uncooperative giant "genie with a gentle physique" in a red skirt and ponytail, and a stone woman with laser beams for eyes.

This is all then promptly forgotten for the next hour when Qamar returns home to woo the first princess disguised as a prince called Norman – this bit drags on rather.

Then it's back to undersea kingdom where the stone woman turns out to be the mother of the two princesses and also a sorceress who transforms into a snake, sets the sorcerer on fire, and tricks Qamar into marrying the wrong princess. Then the biggest shock of all comes when the dwarf turns out not to be gay after all.

But wait, there's more… Qamar is cursed with black skin, but redeems himself and is restored, and given a gift of magic mud which he uses to raise an army to recapture the throne which has been usurped by someone who had previously been under the radar, finally rescuing his princess after a fight on a burning magic carpet.

This is certainly not without its charms. It's fast paced-excepting the middle bit, very colourful, very camp, quite bizarre, and contains a very original dance routine involving felines. Negatives are the disjointed structure and pretty abysmal special effects.

Hercules (1964)

Hercules in pink?

[8/10 · 30 September 2011]

There's an obvious influence of Italian peplums here which were apparently very popular in India, with many scenes seeming extremely familiar, though I doubt you would ever have found Steve Reeves' Hercules living with his mother or wearing a worrying bright pink leopard-skin leotard (actually I was never able to fully ascertain if the pink was the actual colour or a victim of the rather day-glo VCD print available, but the bright red knickers underneath are in no doubt).

You certainly get your money's worth on the monster front, with a motley bunch of rubbery creations lifted randomly from the Ulysses and Perseus catalogues, including a dancing multi- headed hydra, a bunch of Amazons led by the lovely Helen (who dances like her life depended on it), 2 King Kong's (both the giant monkey and the wrestler), some jolly green (and red) giants who laugh maniacally, something that looks like a giant inflatable salamander but it probably said dinosaur in the script, and an old crone with a disturbing dwarf servant who may have been supposed be a Medusa and who transforms into a Cyclops!

I probably missed some of the finer plot points since the review copy had no subtitles, but the gist of it has Hercules battling an evil ruler to restore the rightful heir to the throne by completing a number of tasks accompanied by a bunch of nelly sidekicks, and this being a Dara Singh movie at least 50% of these involve wrestling, lots and lots of wrestling.

The sets, costumes and "special" effects are bright, cheap and cheerful, the action is pretty relentless negating a necessity for subtitles, and like all the Singh catalogue it's highly enjoyable in it's silliness for kids of all ages.

King Kong (1962)

A star is born!

[10/10 · 24 September 2011]

For my first brave attempt at watching an un-subtitled Bollywood movie I naturally chose the starring debut of India's wrestling king of peplum, Dara Singh.

This actually proved to be a wise choice because for a lot of the picture there is no dialogue anyway, just lots of wrestling and other feats of strength (rubber crocodile wrestling, pillar pulling, man tossing, etc.), which is just fine.

The plot, which I mostly gathered from reading a few scant reviews on the internet then attempting to reconcile it with what was on screen, involves Jingu (Singh), who rescues a princess by fighting off some (hilarious) dinosaurs, and as reward is named 'King Kong' by her father, ruler of some Arabian Nights-type kingdom.

This naturally angers the huge man-mountain man who had formally been known as 'King Kong' (played by a Hungarian man-mountain wrestler called 'King Kong'!), so they wrestle it out-twice.

Jingu/Kong seems to have some dilemmas about which girl to marry, but actually obviously prefers living at home with his mother, and both mother and son are naturally overjoyed to discover that one of his somewhat chubbier rivals is actually his long-lost brother!

I think that was about it plot-wise, but it still managed to keep me entertained throughout its 2-hour plus length of non-stop action.

Singh, who has a body to rival any of the body builders working in Italian films at the time, wears white fur boots and fur-trimmed leopard-skin hot pants, and has a bubble perm wig, so he naturally became an overnight movie star and the world became a better place.

The majority of the film is in black and white, but for a few random musical numbers and the all-action finale the screen explodes into glorious colour, a bit faded in the Indian VCD copy I saw but fabulous nonetheless.

This film is a riot from start to finish and I thoroughly recommend it with or without an understanding of Hindi, and, in case you were wondering, it bears absolutely no relation to any other film bearing the same name.

L'assedio di Siracusa (1960)

The Loves of Archimedes

[6/10 · 20 September 2011]

Syracuse is located in the south east corner of Sicily, and in the ancient world it was a powerful Mediterranean city-state allied to Sparta and Corinth, and also notable for being the birthplace of preeminent mathematician and engineer Archimedes.

The film plays a little loosely with the facts since Archimedes was in actuality 75 years old when he was killed in the siege, but here is played by the considerably younger Rossano Brazzi, who ages from approximately 30 to 50 and survives.

It probably wouldn't have played too well to have an old man spurning the King's daughter Clio (bouncy blonde Koscina) for fiery exotic dancer Diana (flame-haired Louise), only to lose her when she's kidnapped by and marries Roman general Marcello (Farnese, clean shaven for once), so he winds up marrying Clio anyway, becoming King when her father dies (now that's really taking historical liberties). The two women spend the film wearing the skimpiest costumes possible while retaining a modicum of decency.

It's these historically dubious loves of Archimedes (a more apt title) which take up the bulk of the plot here, barely leaving him time to invent aqueducts, catapults, and a device capable of setting ships on fire by use of mirrors (this one is true!) in his designer cave laboratory.

It is also historically doubtful that it was Marcello's jealousy at Archimedes and Diana becoming reacquainted which was the catalyst for the Roman's setting siege to Syracuse which, you'll be pleased to hear, does eventually occur in the film's final fifteen minutes.

It's an enjoyable enough cheaply-produced light and fluffy romantic peplum, but if you go in expecting the war film the title promises or a lesson in history you'll come out disappointed.

The Emperor and the Golem (1952)

A comic masterpiece

[10/10 · 18 September 2011]

If this film (actually two short films of a length that with an intermission they make up the standard length of a Hollywood blockbuster) was more widely known internationally it would undoubtedly be regarded as a classic.

I first came across this film completely by accident when I purchased the DVD on a visit to Prague solely on the strength of it having an appealing cover and English subtitles (not a practice I would usually recommend), and totally by accident discovered a wonderful comedy, which has become one of my favourite films.

The production values are high with magnificent sets, beautiful costumes and plenty of colour.

The script is comic genius, with two tour de force hilarious central performances in duel roles by Jan Werich as both eccentric Emperor Rudolf II, given to sudden outbursts of temper which subside just as quickly, whose two obsessions are discovering a potion for reviving his youth and bringing to life a large stone golem, with little regard for the needs of his subjects, and also as the Emperor's baker, who, through a comedy of errors, winds up taking the Emperor's place and putting the world to rights. The supporting cast are also uniformly excellent, totally in tune throughout.

I gather there was an abbreviated version issued for international release, but I would strongly recommend seeking out the full length original to view as it was intended as there isn't a scene goes by that isn't worth savouring.